Hapas who look more asian

[pablohoney]

It seems like most of the hapas who post here say they have identification problems because they look too white, but I have the opposite problem. I'm hapa (Vietnamese mom, caucasian dad) and my looks definitely lean towards the asian side. Even asian people will often think I'm full-blooded asian, although they can't quite tell from where. I have an English last name so people will either think I'm adopted or that it's some weird transliteration from Chinese or something. I get tired of saying I'm mixed and then having someone say, "oh, I didn't know" or "I couldn't tell", so most of the time I don't bother saying anything unless directly asked, and even on survey forms I'll usually just check off "Vietnamese". Anyone else?

[Filiprish]

Well, I'm one of those ambiguous Hapas. I look mixed. Same goes for my older sister. Now, younger sister, she looks Caucasian. She has very light skin and you can barely tell by her eyes. If you look close enough though, you'd think she was a light-skinned Latina. All three of us identify w/ Caucasians, Asians/Filipinos and Hispanics. I can relate b/c people don't always know I'm mixed. Most of the time I get the people who just have to know b/c they can't tell.

pablohoney, so do you think your appearance influences your identity? You don't feel hapa? You get along better w/ Viets than other Hapas and even Caucasians? You might have it better than me b/c you can just identify as Viet and not worry about the ambiguity BS. Then again, you might be selling yourself out if you deny the "Caucasian" aspects of your identity.

[pablohoney]

Actually, most of my friends are white and I really haven't known many Vietnamese people in my life (I know a few now but growing up I knew almost none). I'd always seen myself as mixed and never really thought about it much until adulthood, and then it seemed like both asians and caucasians preferred to see me simply as asian based on how I look. I suppose it shouldn't matter what others think as far as how I identify myself, but it just got tiresome explaining how I'm actually mixed.

I would say I identify most closely with hapas (especially the experience of growing up with one american and one asian parent -- I took Vietnamese in college and most of the class were hapas from the war), although I've noticed hapas who look more white tend to identify themselves as white or some variation (latino, etc). This includes my sister, who is much more "white looking" than I, but I maybe that's just my own deluding thinking.

[Filiprish]

I guess it's up to us as Hapas to assert our existance. You shouldn't let people undermine that and your family. All my friend's know I'm mixed and that they can't pigeon-hole me as either Asian or Caucasian (though, it helps that I look mixed). Every now and then you have to remind people. Shoot it out there. You shouldn't take the burden of other people's ignorance. Ruffle some feathers if you have to.

I most closely identify w/ Hapas too. I take it your dad was in the military? My dad was too. I grew up in J-ville (NC), a military town, so there was mainly Filipino-Caucasians, though I know a handful of Japanese-Caucasians. I always felt like a nomad b/c I had my "brown" friends (Asian/Hapa/Hispanic) and my Caucasian friends. My "brown" friends were like family, so in a way they weren't really my friends. Actually, it's funny, there was more Hapas than full Asians. Sometimes I wonder what the experiences of the full Asians were like and what they thought about us Hapas.

Btw, many Hapas were on the my high school's "Top 10" lists. We were very accepted. We were just part of the norm. It wasn't like that in college.

Just curious, where did you grew up (be as specific as you like)?

[pablohoney]

I grew up outside of Portland, OR. My dad wasn't in the military but he was working in 'Nam during the war, which is, of course, where he met my mom. I wasn't around many asian people growing up, but once I moved to Seattle to go to college I met lots of asians (intenational students, asian-american students, hapas, etc.).

[Filiprish]

Ok, cool. There's a sizeable AA pop. in both Portland and Seattle. From what I understand, there's a lot of Hapas, too. I'm jealous, I've always wanted to live in the Pacific NW -- the AAs, great cities and natural beauty. I don't think I'd ever live there though b/c I like the sun too much. Anyways, getting off-topic.

[Wazza888]

My younger brother leans towards his asian side which is chinese. He has been mistaken for a full-blooded chinese with dyed hair many times by numerous people. I kinda have to agree when you look at him from a far distance but when you get closer you notice his high-bridged nose, light brown eyes and wavy brown hair.

[Leinad]

BTW totally irralavent but Hapa in Maori, hapa means 'power'

[Rollsburgundy]

1st Post! Awesome Forum. Thanks for having me.

I'm 1/2 Korean 1/2 Scandinavian and I definately look more Korean than anglo. Most non asians don't notice but I get asked all of the time by asians what my nationality is. My skin tone is more on the Scandinavian side so that may give it away.

I too have an English last name and a 1/2 sister who is not asian which I'm sure most people don't know she is my sister when we hang out.

[LaiSteve66]

I look more Asian, my brother looks more White.

[BeTheReds]

Let's Share Baby!

[kln4]

Originally Posted by Wazza888

My younger brother leans towards his asian side which is chinese. He has been mistaken for a full-blooded chinese with dyed hair many times by numerous people. I kinda have to agree when you look at him from a far distance but when you get closer you notice his high-bridged nose, light brown eyes and wavy brown hair.

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I met a guy who's exactly like ur bro, he looked chinese when I first saw him...but up close he had hazel eyes, a high-bridged nose, wavy dark brown hair though...He's half-brit.

On the otherhand, I know a girl who's got a high-bridged nose and (never been dyed) brown hair, she looks sorta mixed to me, but she's not....She's full-blooded chinese. Bizarre eh?

[BeTheReds]

Not at all bizarre.


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