My life

[Bishop]

I’m far from perfect and I try to cope/
I’m sick of being a good friend I’ve lost hope/
Take my neck get a grip and grope/
My mom’s running away from the house for a part of time/
Hope she don’t do it again drunk for the second time/
But this time I learned not to care so much/
It’s her decision to hit the clutch and see doubles/
Once she ran out she clipped that seat belt buckle/
Not caring about her kids, I’m what she thought caused her troubles/
The first time it happened I punched the wall with bloody knuckles/
Then she did it twice in couples, I just wished s*it in my house was subtle/
When she finally came back she told me she’ll never do it again/
But then, of course she went back on what she said and did it again/
Third time was it, I said fuck it why should I feel sorry for her mistakes/
I miss the days when she'd cook steaks, smell the spaghetti as the bread bakes/
I look down at the ground as my head shakes, for dinner I’d be eating corn flakes/
I’d be lucky if I ever get my mom to make me pancakes ,but keep on doing what ever it takes/
My heart it aches, and people don’t see the real pain of my thoughts at night/
My life is nothing but a never ending fight, but who knows it could even end tonight/
But I’d rather have no fear than live in fright, I’m gonna try to win every kind of fight/
Then I got my dad on my ass on everything I do, waiting for me to do something wrong/
My happiness is gone, but insist to keep my head up, I can just get so fed up/
With any thing that is consistent I need something different/
My bliss can seem so distant, so I’ll take it and risk it//
Whether its physical or mental, talk s*it go ahead I’ll hit you in the temple/
I got my problems as does everyone else, and I’ll put up with what I’m dealt/
When my uncle died no one knew how I felt, I trusted no one enough to tell/
Looking for my own property to sell, just so I got money to burn/
But if there’s one thing I’ve learned, it’s to never lose a turn/

I want to be a good friend yet a better person/
People see me as a bad person cause they overheard me cursing/
Why do people see me as a bad guy? I’m not a bad guy, even though I laugh at people that cry/
People that die, it’s better than being shy, as my crying ends then I sigh/
And I laugh at the conflicts I possess, so from now on lets just forget about the rest/
Concentrate on one thing instead of the whole list /
I chuckle because you don’t even know me homie, don’t even sweat those phonies/
I sit in school, hands on my knees looking for a girl to hold me/
I daydream about s*it that wont happen in the real life of mine/
God throws me off with signs I can’t abide by and it makes me want to die and fly away/
But what can I say I’m just human right ain’t I correct?/
You may be able to top my intellect but you can’t top my determination/
My emotions are out now so look at what you’re facing/
The greatest dreams I’m chasing as time and I are racing/
So why try so hard and get scarred and throw down bars/
Why not inhale Sars, get hit by cars and terrorize other peoples yards/
Don’t get me wrong you will get what you deserve, you get back what you serve/
Build up the nerve to say I’m dull, you don’t know half the s*it I had to endure/
I’m on a journey to become a man and you don’t know s*it about me or my friends/
So don’t judge me or them, because you don’t know if they f**ked with the system/
It’s like I got hit with boulders and got put to the test/
I feel so unblessed and who would’ve guessed/
That I’m different from the rest, I suppose hard times is just god putting me to the test/
The past is past the future is soon, and my life is such a mess/
I’m just so happy that I got all this shit off my shoulders and chest/