Is it your father or your mother who is Asian?

[mndeg]

just wondering, any of you with asian dads and white moms, not the typical white dad/asian mom?

[Mr.Lum]

I have an Asian dad (half Chinese/Algerian) and a Fijian mom.....but she's not white.

[Filiprish]

just wondering, any of you with asian dads and white moms, not the typical white dad/asian mom?
Nope, typical here. As you know, they're very rare. I do know two people with AF dad/WF mom. One's male, the other female (not related). The male is pretty Asian-conscious, the female is even more "whitewashed" than your typical hapa.

[rice cracker]

just wondering, any of you with asian dads and white moms, not the typical white dad/asian mom?


bethereds, the other moderator of the hapa forum.

I, however, am the seed of the most stereotypical interracial relationship, the white GI dad and the poor Asian momma.

[Gunz]

Bruce Lee had a white American wife, Linda. Brandon Lee and his sister look white, but the tall cheekbones are the only thing which even identify them as having Asian genes. I felt Bruce Lee's story of his struggles in America in the 60s and 70s inspired me to search out more Asians.

[BeTheReds]

Another thread moving off topic caused me to make this new thread about how there might be a difference between the upbringing and general view of hapas in different parental circumstances.

Does having an Asian father instead of an Asian mother work to your advantage in being accepted in certain situations?

Does having an Asian mother leave a child more in touch with his/her Asian roots?

What kind of outlook would a second generation hapa have?

Discuss!

[TB4000]

just wondering, any of you with asian dads and white moms, not the typical white dad/asian mom?
Don't leave out the kiddies that have black/latino parents in conjunction with the asian one also. :wink:

[truMp]

Both of my parents are asian, but my uncle has a white wife. Another one of my aunts has an Indian (not native american) husband. I've seen a lot of AF/WM around, but its predominantly WF/AM.

[BigLew]

Neither! Oh was this for hapas? Sorry.

[Emperor_Mike]

Both of my parents are hapa. Why isn't that an option?

[BeTheReds]

Both of my parents are hapa. Why isn't that an option?


It is. "I have a hapa parent" fits that. I suppose I could have said I have a hapa parent(s). but oh well.

[asvenus]

Don't leave out the kiddies that have black/latino parents in conjunction with the asian one also. :wink:


exactly...pah...neither of my parents are whiteys so there :tongue:

two hapa parents...cool!! or not...wow double dose of hapa angst??!!

i think having an Asian mama makes (nay forces!!) you to identify with your Asianess unless she is ashamed or something...and just by some mad osmosis you pick up little manerisms and habits that are peculiar to the Asian peoples!! :wink:

[SunWuKong]

Bruce Lee had a white American wife, Linda. Brandon Lee and his sister look white, but the tall cheekbones are the only thing which even identify them as having Asian genes. I felt Bruce Lee's story of his struggles in America in the 60s and 70s inspired me to search out more Asians.

just FIY, Bruce Lee had a German grandmother.

[rice cracker]

I dunno, I don't think the gender of the Asian parent has *that* much to do with influence on the child. Wouldn't it be the same, as far as customs and things go? I don't think an Asian mom is less likely to tell her kids about chusok (or what have you) than an Asian dad. Of course I'm aware of the "if your dad is Asian, you're Asian" ideology, but I think having an Asian parent period is gonna rub off on you.

And, obviously, this was a biased post, since I really can't speak for hapas with Asian dads like I know what that's really like. I just know my Korean mom dressed us up in hanboks when relatives came over, cussed at us in Korean and fed us Korean dishes in addition to telling us when it was a Korean holiday (which was usually why relatives came over and we had to wear hanboks).

[BeTheReds]

I dunno, I don't think the gender of the Asian parent has *that* much to do with influence on the child. Wouldn't it be the same, as far as customs and things go? I don't think an Asian mom is less likely to tell her kids about chusok (or what have you) than an Asian dad. Of course I'm aware of the "if your dad is Asian, you're Asian" ideology, but I think having an Asian parent period is gonna rub off on you.

And, obviously, this was a biased post, since I really can't speak for hapas with Asian dads like I know what that's really like. I just know my Korean mom dressed us up in hanboks when relatives came over, cussed at us in Korean and fed us Korean dishes in addition to telling us when it was a Korean holiday (which was usually why relatives came over and we had to wear hanboks).


The only thing I have in common with the above is when my dad would tell me that it's a Korean holiday. And we'd go have a picnic, that's about it. Children tend to spend more time with and try to emulate their mothers. The way that asian moms and asian dads influence their kids is totally different. Especially since gender roles are more defined over there.

Naturally if we aren't talking about immigrant parents but a 2nd or 3rd gen Asian parent then it probably wouldn't matter too much which one was Asian though.

Not that I'm an expert on it or anything tho..

[rice cracker]

The only thing I have in common with the above is when my dad would tell me that it's a Korean holiday. And we'd go have a picnic, that's about it. Children tend to spend more time with and try to emulate their mothers. The way that asian moms and asian dads influence their kids is totally different. Especially since gender roles are more defined over there.

Naturally if we aren't talking about immigrant parents but a 2nd or 3rd gen Asian parent then it probably wouldn't matter too much which one was Asian though.

Not that I'm an expert on it or anything tho..

You didn't have to wear a hanbok? What about for family pictures?

[BeTheReds]

You didn't have to wear a hanbok? What about for family pictures?


I'm a boy.

I think the only time I wore hanbok was my 100th day alive ceremony, and it was a hand be down from my older bro.

[rice cracker]

I'm a boy.

I think the only time I wore hanbok was my 100th day alive ceremony, and it was a hand be down from my older bro.

They have boy hanboks. I'm probably calling it the wrong name. OK, according to E-Hanbok it's called Baji-Jeogori.

http://www.e-hanbok.com/HanbokImg/man/k219-2.jpg

[BeTheReds]

They have boy hanboks. I'm probably calling it the wrong name. OK, according to E-Hanbok it's called Baji-Jeogori.

http://www.e-hanbok.com/HanbokImg/man/k219-2.jpg


Yes, they exist, but the only time Korean men and boys wear hanbok these days is their 100th day alive ceremony and their wedding, maybe. In all other formal occasions a suit is fine. It's actually strange for men to wear hanbok in any other situation, unless their job is related to korean folk dancing or folk arts or something.

[AliBabaIncorporated]

I read an article in the paper here a while ago about some boarding school in Korea where they made all the kids wear hanbok ... it was called the "ethnic leadership academy" or something ...

[rice cracker]

Yes, they exist, but the only time Korean men and boys wear hanbok these days is their 100th day alive ceremony and their wedding, maybe. In all other formal occasions a suit is fine. It's actually strange for men to wear hanbok in any other situation, unless their job is related to korean folk dancing or folk arts or something.

My uncle used to come over all the time in his hanbok...

Of course, this was like a decade ago. I've heard the suit thing, that they're much more popular.

I'm so out of touch. :frown:

[BigLew]

My uncle used to come over all the time in his hanbok...

Of course, this was like a decade ago. I've heard the suit thing, that they're much more popular.

I'm so out of touch. :frown:I didn't even know what the hell a hanbok was till today. I must be realy out of touch. It's true what they say I am such a banana!

[Mr.Lum]

Does having an Asian father instead of an Asian mother work to your advantage in being accepted in certain situations?



I don't know. I think there may be more pressure to ID as asian tho.


Does having an Asian mother leave a child more in touch with his/her Asian roots?

No. I'd say, judging from my interactions with mixed Asians (with Asian mothers), it leaves them less so.

What kind of outlook would a second generation hapa have?


The kind that I do. I don't think you can generalize that way successfully tho.

[BeTheReds]

I don't know. I think there may be more pressure to ID as asian tho.



No. I'd say, judging from my interactions with mixed Asians (with Asian mothers), it leaves them less so.



The kind that I do. I don't think you can generalize that way successfully tho.


These were more of points to start a discussion, not actual questions.

[asvenus]

i dunno...from what i see and from having an Asian mama myself...i think jsut the fact that you are usually around your mama more in the formulative years, get cussed out by her alot more than your dad (maybe mines just got an extra large mouth!!)...and stuff you get influenced more than if you have an Asian father...(see bethereds post)....maybe my dads just more chilled and stuff and my mums a crazed manic neurotic woman always screaming in her language..(oh dear!! i was hoping this was common!!) and also cos mamas cook for ya and clean mre and moake clothes...i dunno i just think you learn more from having an Asian mama by virtue of the fact that women do more and have more interaction with the kiddies...

[AngryABCGirl]

Don't most children take on the father's culture, especially if they are part of the dominant culture?

[AliBabaIncorporated]

Don't most children take on the father's culture, especially if they are part of the dominant culture?
Usually, kids end up with whatever culture most of their friends belong to. Parental influence on most aspects of a child's development is greatly overstated, usually by parents themselves who are confusing influence with genetics.

[BeTheReds]

Don't most children take on the father's culture, especially if they are part of the dominant culture?


I'd think that the kids tend to be more like (first) the society they live in and (second) which ever parent they spend more time around (usually the mom).

[YuheiCarreau]

I'd think that the kids tend to be more like (first) the society they live in and (second) which ever parent they spend more time around (usually the mom).

I dunno about you... But back when I was just a wee 'un, there was a period of about 9 months when I was damn near inseperable from my mother...

[BeTheReds]

I guess you're a pro-lifer then huh.

[YuheiCarreau]

I guess you're a pro-lifer then huh.

Nah, just Japanese.

[BeTheReds]

Okay well then your opinion is that life starts at conception but it is okay to kill babies before they are born...

HAHA just givin you a hard time.

[sandra]

just fyi, the poll is a bit flawed b/c both my parents are asian, but my dad is also hapa (aren't you still asian if you're hapa?)

[BeTheReds]

just fyi, the poll is a bit flawed b/c both my parents are asian, but my dad is also hapa (aren't you still asian if you're hapa?)


Stop being difficult.

[sandra]

Stop being difficult.
it's a serious question! :eek: if both parents of a member are asian, then this forum really wouldn't pertain to that member anyway, right?

so maybe we can clarify the categories in the poll.

edit: nevermind, i think i get it.

the question is: which one of your parents is white?

so i guess my answer is: my dad is hapa.

that hasn't affected me much at all, aside from the fact that my dad often gets treated (at least initially) like an outsider. when it comes to cultural practices, etc., there's never been a problem, b/c my dad was born and raised in China/Hong Kong.

[BeTheReds]

it's a serious question! :eek: if both parents of a member are asian, then this forum really wouldn't pertain to that member anyway, right?

I put that answer there so that monoracial Asians wouldn't mess up the stats. Yes, hapas are Asians, but not all Asians are hapas. It doesn't mean which of your parents is white, because that leaves blasians out of the stats.

Anyway the stats show a not so startling trend.

[asvenus]

i just looked at the results and they do kinda confirm the stereotype dont they??!!
even in my family this is quite strong, i have two aunties and one uncle (on my mums side) and my uncle is the only one who has an asian partner :redface: we're just a buncha sellouts!!

interestingly (well for me anyway) on my dads side, this is reversed, where there is mixing, it is the women that have the different 'race' partners..
my family are just strange..and mixed..and strange

[BeTheReds]

i just looked at the results and they do kinda confirm the stereotype dont they??!!



I'm not so sure 14 people is an accurate look at worldwide hapadom.

But yes, if we were to poll every single hapa in the world, I'd be willing to bet that it's probably 60% NAM/AF 30%AM/NAF 10% One or 2 hapa parents.

Of course that's not really what this thread is about.

[asvenus]

I'm not so sure 14 people is an accurate look at worldwide hapadom.

yes BTR i know its hardly a representative poll of 'hapa' parentage globally, but surely us, the ones on YW are the only ones that matter :tongue:

[BeTheReds]

yes BTR i know its hardly a representative poll of 'hapa' parentage globally, but surely us, the ones on YW are the only ones that matter :tongue:


Some more than others. MUHAHAHAHAHA

[ramen_freak]

My father is Japanese and my mother is a Russian Jew. Everyone that sees me either thinks I'm Mexican (or any other hispanic ethicity- I've heard Columbian, Brazilian, Spanish), or they think I'm Middle Eastern, and one time some one asked me if I was Indian. Hardly anyone guesses that I'm Japanese- or even the general, "Asian". I wonder if that happens more with hapa children of Asian males, compared to females.

[BeTheReds]

I wonder if that happens more with hapa children of Asian males, compared to females.


No, because even when the father is the Asian one, the kids can sometimes come out looking mostly Asian or even exclusively Asian.

I don't think the stats have ever been measured (or who would judge how Asian someone looked to compile the stats,) but as far as probability and genetics goes, you are equally as likely to look like your mother as you are to look like your father. Thus I'd say that your experience is most similar to non-Asian, non-white looking Eurasian males, and they come from all different kinds of combinations.

Peace, and welcome to the forum.

Read the guidelines if you get a chance!

[pablohoney]

I had a hapa roommate in college who had a Japanese father and a white (American) mother. I can't really think of anything unique about him that I attributed to his having an Asian father rather than mother. He had mostly Asian features except that he was taller than avg (5'11) and had coarse, wavy hair. Really, about the only thing having an Asian father means is that you'll probably have an Asian surname.

[BeTheReds]

Really, about the only thing having an Asian father means is that you'll probably have an Asian surname.


That might be true when you are talking about having 2nd generation Asian-American father or mother.. but if you are talking about having straight out of Asia father or mother, it makes a huge difference, as gender roles are defined differently in Asia.


Someone who has an 2gen Asian-American dad and a white mom, probably won't be that different from someone who has a White dad and an 2 gen Asian-American mom, because both of those people's parents are Americans.

However if someone has a white dad and a fobby mom, as opposed to a fobby dad and a white mom.. it's totally different.

A continuation of the conversation along these lines will only lead to a debate over IR, and we've had enough of that topic for now... so I'll just leave it at that.

[pablohoney]

However if someone has a white dad and a fobby mom, as opposed to a fobby dad and a white mom.. it's totally different.


Hm, not sure what you mean. My roommate's dad was Japanese (not American), although his parents divorced when he was 10 and his dad moved back to Japan. His mom had custody but he would go to Japan to live with his father during the summers, so he was definitely exposed to both parents and both cultures. I didn't really notice much difference in him compared to all the other Japanese hapas I knew in college (I knew a bunch of Japanese hapas who grew up overseas on military bases, all of whom had white fathers). The only real difference I noticed was that hapas who grew up overseas and around other hapas seemed pretty well adjusted to both whites and Asians, while my roommate was only really comfortable around Asians and hapas, probably because he grew up in some pretty redneck towns.

[BeTheReds]

Hm, not sure what you mean.


All I am saying is that gender roles in Asian cultures are different, and huge differences in upbringing can depend upon which parent is Asian. While yes, in some cases, it may seem that there are not many differences, this isn't true in most. These differences extend further than simply having an Asian surname.

Furthermore, from one observation of your one friend in college, you can't make a definitive statement about most hapas.

[pablohoney]

I see what you're saying and I don't think we disagree. I probably over generalized when I said there are no differences but the surname, but I meant it more as a response to the idea that there is a definitive difference in hapas with Asian fathers vs. Asian mothers. You're saying most of the time there is a difference, which based on my limited exposure to hapas with Asian fathers, I couldn't possibly dispute.

[Chad]

I don't think the father or mother's sex matter when it comes to looks. Both pass their DNA on to the child in equal amounts regardless of sex, right? My siblings and I have varied looks. People don't usually think we are related.
I have a white American mother and a fobby Asian father. My impression is that people in this situation rely on their mother for cultural learning since the father can't provide it.

[BeTheReds]

I see what you're saying and I don't think we disagree. I probably over generalized when I said there are no differences but the surname, but I meant it more as a response to the idea that there is a definitive difference in hapas with Asian fathers vs. Asian mothers. You're saying most of the time there is a difference, which based on my limited exposure to hapas with Asian fathers, I couldn't possibly dispute.


Well i guess a lot of the difference comes from the fact that most young children tend to spend more time with their mothers.

[dontblush]

my mom is asian (viet).

[Chad]

Status maximization theory posits that mixed-race individuals will adopt as their racial identity whichever of their parents' races has the higher social status. Mixed-race adolescents may understand that there is a hierarchy of racial statuses and attempt to status maximize by identifying themselves as the more highly esteemed of their parents' races. Identity theory posits that individuals identify themselves racially based on the quality and quantity of their bonds and contacts with people of various races in their social networks. For instance, bonds or ties to parents, siblings, friends, neighborhoods, schools, or any other social network of the adolescents may influence their sense of self, including their racial identity.

[Craig]

Status maximization theory posits that mixed-race individuals will adopt as their racial identity whichever of their parents' races has the higher social status. Mixed-race adolescents may understand that there is a hierarchy of racial statuses and attempt to status maximize by identifying themselves as the more highly esteemed of their parents' races. Identity theory posits that individuals identify themselves racially based on the quality and quantity of their bonds and contacts with people of various races in their social networks. For instance, bonds or ties to parents, siblings, friends, neighborhoods, schools, or any other social network of the adolescents may influence their sense of self, including their racial identity.This "status maximization theory" sounds like a load of crock. How many mixed African Americans identify as white ?

Anybody hear of the "path of least resistance" theory ?

[Chad]

This "status maximization theory" sounds like a load of crock. How many mixed African Americans identify as white ?

Anybody hear of the "path of least resistance" theory ?
Identity theory. Sorry, should have made it two paragraphs instead of one.

[BeTheReds]

How about the "being just white these days is uncool" theory, that most online hapas seem to subscribe to.

[returntosender]

Well, if you guys take a visit to Eurasianation and Hapas.com, the status maximization theory holds true for the majority of the hapas, more for the females than the males. The majority of the females tended to date White/other hapas while the guys were more inclined to date Asians, though were clearly preferring hapas.

And bi-racial part AfricanAmerican kids can't identify themselves as white because society tends to group them with other blacks, in spit of skin color.

[pablohoney]

Well, if you guys take a visit to Eurasianation and Hapas.com, the status maximization theory holds true for the majority of the hapas, more for the females than the males. The majority of the females tended to date White/other hapas while the guys were more inclined to date Asians, though were clearly preferring hapas.


I don't think that's a hapa thing or any identity thing, it's just an extension of what's already been seen with the dating practices of many full-blooded Asian females and males in the US.

I've never heard of "status maximization theory" but it seems like pretty common sense. It's a natural reaction for people to accentuate what they believe is desirable and downplay what's not. Race is one of many things that this could be applied to (not saying it's right, just that it's not surprising).

[Napoleon Chynamite]

There's a significant Asian population here on campus, so maybe that's why I see more hapas (girls and guys) hanging out with other asian people than with white people. The other day I was walking around and I actually saw more asian guy/white girl couples than the other way around. I was thinking to myself "what the hell is going on here", haha.

[nola]

Back to the leitmotif, the dominant and recurring theme of YW, IR. Which I understand slightly better now thanks to you, Hube.

[Chad]

This "status maximization theory" sounds like a load of crock. How many mixed African Americans identify as white ?

It's different for black/white individuals because of the established one-drop rule concerning African Americans. You are considered black even if you are only 1/8 African heritage.

[BeTheReds]

I think it's a load of crock myself, as very few people who are mixed with White can be considered White.

[Chad]

wow, more hapas on this forum than i expected. and 10 of us with asian fathers, another surprise. i think i've only met one other hapa with an asian father in my whole life, usually i am the only one.

[sunni]

Both my parents are from the phillipines, but they are mestizos. Whenever I tell people that spanish, chinese and filipino is a common mix, they are still confused and keep asking me, but is your dad american? I must admit, I don't want to label myself straight up flip because I'm afraid people will start asking me if I want a job cleaning their house! (I live in Asia)

BTW, here's what an australian mixed with korean looks like: Hot!
http://www.seoulstyle.com/people_davidNo.htm

[Wazza888]

My mum is asian (chinese) and my dad is white (australian/dutch/belgian).

[grimfan]

I think a big factor in any imbalance in Asian-white parentage is the fact that most Asian families would rather give up a daughter to a foreigner, than give their son to one. Especially Asian mothers who do not speak English well; they'll see a non-Asian mother to their grandchildren as a prime threat. In the case with daughters, they're not expected to carry on the family legacy or anything, and marrying a white man is a step-up on the social ladder.

I know a Korean mom who held this exact attitude. It really angered me, because essentially, if this was the prevailing attitude, then the only Korean girls who married Korean men would be the "losers", or the ones not good enough to snag a white man. Meanwhile, Korean men were forbidden to venture out in the dating pool, bound by "family honour" or whatever outdated bullshit. What the hell kind of message is this? Why not just castrate all Korean men while they're at it?

[Chad]

I don't know anything about the Korean thing, but my Chinese grandparents were not too happy about their son's chosen wife. Please don't marry the ang moh devil.
I think they imagined their grandchildren would would all look like red-haired orangutans.

[kimpossible]

I think they imagined their grandchildren would would all look like red-haired orangutans.

And some of us indeed do.

[Deadpool]

wow, more hapas on this forum than i expected. and 10 of us with asian fathers, another surprise. i think i've only met one other hapa with an asian father in my whole life, usually i am the only one.

Weird eh. Almost all the hapas I met where I live have Asian dads, despite from the IR disparity I read on the net. Met a Thai dude not too long ago who barely speaks english. He has a little kid with a Dutch wife.
I might change though after the large number of wm/af couples start having kids. *shrug*

[Chad]

Where do you live at? I think it's the opposite where I live because of the number of Texans who volunteer for military service. As a youth I saw so many families that fit the stereotype of the white soldier father and foreign bride. Thank goodness for my own father, or else I might have never known that Asian men existed except on TV.
More recently I've met more kids and families with Asian father and non-Asian mother. I suspect this is due to an economic change in my social circles since being exposed to things like academia and business associations.
Now that I think of it, there may be a correlation there... are families in America with an Asian father and non-Asian mother typically more wealthy than the opposite? From my very limited impressions from online communication in hapa forums, it seemed to me like hapas with Asian fathers were almost always well-off.

[Deadpool]

... are families in America with an Asian father and non-Asian mother typically more wealthy than the opposite? From my very limited impressions from online communication in hapa forums, it seemed to me like hapas with Asian fathers were almost always well-off.

I'm in Vancouver.
And from what I myself have observed this seems to be the case here. The IR families with wm dads seemed a less affluent.
Not trying to stereotype here but they were many instances where they were fat n fugly and the wives tended to be straight off the boat.
But then again this might be a unique situation here due to the fact that Asian peoples are the dominant here. I bet its reverse elsewhere.

[kimpossible]

I don't know if this still holds true, but for AF/WM like a generation ago it was a lot of military guys with foreign brides and the military doesn't pay a lot. So you might be able to classify that as blue collar, maybe.

[crystalklee]

My father is Korean and my mother is caucasian. My mom was somewhat of a hippie in the '60s and dug ethnic guys I guess.

[LaiSteve66]

My dad is Asian

[jdmdrift]

my dad is japanese, my mom is caucasion.
my dad was a 2nd generation american, my grandfather came here during ww2, but my father was raised very "american" because my grandfather held alot of pride in coming here.
my father later in life after marrying my mom (caucasion) he decided he was white washed, left my mom moved back to japan and married a japanese women.
but i was always raised to respect my culture and even though im hapa ive always been told i was asian since my dad was asian.
so thats how i identify, if im asked i just say asian, i dont say hapa i dont say white.
and my fiance is actually korean, so i would say yes the stereotype is correct as far as "hapa" guys identifying more with asian.

[strawberries]

Well,my mother is caucasian and my father is korean/japanese.Now i live with them in Germany,but my dad was raised up in Seoul.And my dad,he is actually 4 years younger then my mother!They are not married.I look like common asian i think.Maybe even more japanese,because i dye my hair and i am small.

[BeTheReds]

Well,my mother is caucasian and my father is korean/japanese.Now i live with them in Germany,but my dad was raised up in Seoul.And my dad,he is actually 4 years younger then my mother!They are not married.I look like common asian i think.Maybe even more japanese,because i dye my hair and i am small.

You joined YW just for that?

[najjia]

well both of my parents r filipino. my mom is half chinese & my dad is half indian. i always say im pure filipino tho. i just dont see any sense in talking about my ethnic mix when both my parents are born & bred filipinos. saying im filipino-american is sufficient enough.

[BeTheReds]

Yea! Don't let anyone tell you who you are. Sock it to them!

[mandonfire]

Mother - yes, typical sob story.

[krazy-h]

I think having a Chinese mom as opposed to a Chinese dad makes a difference in how people view me. It's a patriarchal world, and people generally respect the father's influence more. For example, during the Japanese American internment, hapa kids with Japanese fathers were interned, but those with Japanese mothers were not. Also, I'm in China now and Chinese here identify where they are from based on their father's hometown.

I notice that full-blooded Asian Americans always want to know "which side of me" is Asian. They usually seem dissapointed I fit the stereotype of Asian mother. I had a hapa friend whose father in Korean, and Korean Americans always seemed please to discover this, especially males. The message of having an Asian dad and white mom is like, "Score one for the Asian guys!"

I think that the level of Asian influence can vary in every situation, no matter Asian dad or mom. To further complicate things, I think the gender of the hapa child makes a difference since a boy may spend more time with his father, and a girl with her mother. And even if this is not true, as in my case, people generally assume that a hapa boy with a white father will take after his father.

[Yumika]

Both my parents are asian, but I was born and raised here in Canada. But what would define if you're asian or not? The way you look? Or the cultures and traditions you follow?

[BeTheReds]

Both my parents are asian, but I was born and raised here in Canada. But what would define if you're asian or not? The way you look? Or the cultures and traditions you follow?


That depends on who you ask. To yourself, it's how you feel. To everyone else, it is how they percieve you. For people you don't know, that falls under looks. For people you do know that falls under your personality.

Dig?

[BeTheReds]

bump...

This forum is growing thin.. need to resurrect some old threads...

[User1]

That might be true when you are talking about having 2nd generation Asian-American father or mother.. but if you are talking about having straight out of Asia father or mother, it makes a huge difference, as gender roles are defined differently in Asia.


Someone who has an 2gen Asian-American dad and a white mom, probably won't be that different from someone who has a White dad and an 2 gen Asian-American mom, because both of those people's parents are Americans.

However if someone has a white dad and a fobby mom, as opposed to a fobby dad and a white mom.. it's totally different.

A continuation of the conversation along these lines will only lead to a debate over IR, and we've had enough of that topic for now... so I'll just leave it at that.

Thats true.....and usually the kids take after the culture of the Fobby dad