View Full Version : i want a gay best friend
kasia
10-08-2003, 10:57 AM
this annoys me to death.
it seems that after 'my best friend's wedding', every girl wants her own personal gay best friend - as though gay men are pets or something. i've had girls announce to me, on more than one occasion, that she wished she had a gay best friend. wth?
do you think that the movie has made this trendy? that along with 'will and grace' - seems to have given gay men some validity in society - but only if you fit that mold.
do you ever wonder why, in movies, that men don't have best lesbian friends??
SunWuKong
10-08-2003, 11:52 AM
do you ever wonder why, in movies, that men don't have best lesbian friends??
because "Hollywood lesbians" are women that men fantasize about, not women that men make friends with.
TyroneK(prettypretty)
10-08-2003, 11:52 AM
Lesbians are women who hate men, right?
Seriously though, I think women mainly love having the idea of a guy friend who can give them the attention and validation they crave from the opposite sex without having to repel any unwanted attraction a heterosexual man might develop towards them. It's like having the best of all worlds.
I'm sure there's some trendiness involved, but I think a lot of it has to do with the fact that most women in mainstream society hadn't even thought of gays in a positive light until recently. Now that gay men aren't completely seen as walking HIV virus factories, attitudes towards homosexuality have really changed a lot.
Chris
10-08-2003, 11:56 AM
*sigh* is this why all my best freinds are girls????? I am their Will. *stiffles a sob*
Women want attention from persons of the opposite sex without the harrasment from straight sexually charged males. Plus, gay males are very in tune with their feminine side which is an added bonus as it helps them to understand womens needs and desires. I guess talking about cute guys is a common bond between them (lol)
Well the assumption that gay men are "in tune with their feminine side" is perhaps why it's annoying for straight women to have gay best friends. Of course, gay men may want to have female best friends as fag hag, so the idea of exploitation exists on both sides. Sadly, I find it a bit of a farce that a straight woman would only be best friends with a guy just because he's gay.
deez nuts
10-08-2003, 01:36 PM
i want a gay best friend too.
they know lots of hot chicks.
kimpossible
10-08-2003, 01:37 PM
Seriously though, I think women mainly love having the idea of a guy friend who can give them the attention and validation they crave from the opposite sex without having to repel any unwanted attraction a heterosexual man might develop towards them. It's like having the best of all worlds.
I'm not speaking for all women but this sounds about right to me. Guilty as charged. I'll own this one.
Chris
10-08-2003, 01:37 PM
i want a gay best friend too.
they know lots of hot chicks.
Dude get your behind to SF. I have tons of hot ladies friends who love to know a hot MD like you bro.
deez nuts
10-08-2003, 01:39 PM
Dude get your behind to SF. I have tons of hot ladies friends who love to know a hot MD like you bro.
so far!
coagulated fat
10-08-2003, 01:40 PM
I'm not speaking for all women but this sounds about right to me. Guilty as charged. I'll own this one.
Me too.
YuheiCarreau
10-08-2003, 01:52 PM
Usually I hear this from women who want a man they can flirt and cuddle with hassle-free. Also they want to be around a man who makes scathing sarcastic comments about people.
SunWuKong
10-08-2003, 02:19 PM
hmmm...
maybe it's time to consider pretending to be gay...
ChinaLama
10-08-2003, 02:35 PM
Lesbians are women who hate men, right?
Seriously though, I think women mainly love having the idea of a guy friend who can give them the attention and validation they crave from the opposite sex without having to repel any unwanted attraction a heterosexual man might develop towards them. It's like having the best of all worlds.
Eunuchs. That's the answer for women who want the above. Castrated before puberty.
Chris
10-08-2003, 02:35 PM
hmmm...
maybe it's time to consider pretending to be gay...
SWK. I don't think you can pull it off. People will see right through you. But I will give respect if you can try and suceed. hahah
Chris
10-08-2003, 02:36 PM
so far!
I know. But hey you have that option you know. :dance:
ChinaLama
10-08-2003, 02:36 PM
SWK. I don't think you can pull it off. People will see right through you. But I will give respect if you can try and suceed. hahah
people think i'm gay even when i deny it, so i think i can pull it off. except i'm too sloppy-- and people only like the fashionable clean gays these days. fuck.
SunWuKong
10-08-2003, 02:51 PM
people think i'm gay even when i deny it, so i think i can pull it off. except i'm too sloppy-- and people only like the fashionable clean gays these days. fuck.
you know, there's no way to deny that you're gay without sounding like you're being defensive and therefore a closet case. :p
"no, i'm not gay."
see?
kimpossible
10-08-2003, 02:54 PM
My husband tells me that a lot of people thought he was gay because he was a fencer, spoke French and loved everything about France, was way into poetry and never had a date.
ChinaLama
10-08-2003, 02:54 PM
you know, there's no way to deny that you're gay without sounding like you're being defensive and therefore a closet case. :p
"no, i'm not gay."
see?
well, there's always, "why do you care? i wouldn't be gay with YOU." or there's "why don't you ask your mom/sister/gf if i'm gay?"
Chris
10-08-2003, 02:57 PM
My husband tells me that a lot of people thought he was gay because he was a fencer, spoke French and loved everything about France, was way into poetry and never had a date.
hehe i was a fencer. :)
kimpossible
10-08-2003, 03:05 PM
is there an official term for girls who are gaymenophiles? other than fag hag.
applehead
10-08-2003, 03:47 PM
*sigh* is this why all my best freinds are girls????? I am their Will. *stiffles a sob*
but jack is so much funnier.
Chris
10-08-2003, 04:10 PM
but jack is so much funnier.
I work in the legal industry like will. :D
skatergrl
10-08-2003, 04:23 PM
Lesbians are women who hate men, right?
Men hate lesbians, right? :glare:
TyroneK(prettypretty)
10-08-2003, 09:37 PM
Men hate lesbians, right? :glare:
I meant that as a joke. Notice how I said "seriously though" after that comment, indicating that the text up to that point had been in jest.
kasia
10-08-2003, 11:13 PM
Well the assumption that gay men are "in tune with their feminine side" is perhaps why it's annoying for straight women to have gay best friends.
this is kinda what i mean. certainly not all gay guys are like rupert everett or will.
and on second thought, would it be accurate to say that they're 'in tune with their feminine side'? i know you have that in quotes already. but...can't they just be 'gay'? do you know what i mean?
kboy75
10-09-2003, 07:34 AM
Hollywood glamorizes being a gay male. Not everyone is Jack from Will and Grace!
I actually have a lot of gay friends from my days in the Bay Area, from school and working. There are assholes and cool guys/girls, just like with everyone else. Too many people stick to stereotypes.
My lesbian friends are for the most part the "butch" type but they arethe coolest and most open people I know. And not all gay guys are in tune with their feminine side. One guy I know is a total slob, knows nothing about skin products or fashion. The only way you'd know he is gay is from the raindow pin he wears walking around in the Castro with his latest boy-toy of the month.
Also, not all guys who are in touch with their feminine side are gay. They might just be metrosexual. LOTS of metrosexuals in Manhattan.
ChinaLama
10-09-2003, 02:12 PM
i thought you guys meant Jack from Three's Company. the character's names was Jack, right?
Emperor_Mike
10-14-2003, 02:59 AM
I have a lesbian friend. She's very loud and fits the stereotype. Pleasant girl, however.
I also have a gay friend. He doesn't have many woman friends though and he spends a lot of time with straight guys; so much in fact that they've taken to calling him the "Straight Gay Guy." Heh.
AngryABCGirl
10-15-2003, 09:29 AM
this is kinda what i mean. certainly not all gay guys are like rupert everett or will.
and on second thought, would it be accurate to say that they're 'in tune with their feminine side'? i know you have that in quotes already. but...can't they just be 'gay'? do you know what i mean?
Yeah, people try to pigeonhole what is gay or anything different in general. Gotta ask the question, can I just be human?
kasia
10-16-2003, 10:09 AM
just be careful when you bend over. you just might get something pushed into your a-hole.
just be careful of what you say on this board. we might just push something sharp up your a-hole. :)
Chris
10-16-2003, 11:48 AM
hey hold on a minute. are'nt you a lawyer and by default are'nt you one for free speech in a democratic environment? if so, why act all fascist and threaten to ban people just by expressing opnions you may not agree with? btw, i don't think my statement offended anyone.
Oh you didn't go there.
You offended Me. I find it not funny and uncouth. If you have a problem with it. Then we'll take it in private. Not all gay men are like horndogs as you just protray us.
Emperor_Mike
10-16-2003, 12:44 PM
chill, i was just trying to be funny originally. oh and what are you upset about? maybe you're not horndogs but that's the way you have intercourse.if you take offence to that then perhaps one should'nt mention anything about intercourse at all.
Perhaps one should exercise greater tact when dealing with issues that have the potential to create arguments of the kind that involve hostile exchanges. Unpleasantness stem from misunderstandings and greater degrees of unpleasantness result in unfortunate incidents that cost lives in some places. Free speech is one thing, but to engage in thoughtless and insensitive banter at the expense of an individual or a group of individuals is not what I would term being civil to your neighbour.
In any case, play nicely and users here will be more than happy to reciprocate. :)
kasia
10-16-2003, 12:45 PM
chill, i was just trying to be funny originally. oh and what are you upset about? maybe you're not horndogs but that's the way you have intercourse.if you take offence to that then perhaps one should'nt mention anything about intercourse at all.
please refer to the YW guidelines in the feedback forum and stay on the topic.
skatergrl
10-16-2003, 03:17 PM
just be careful when you bend over. you just might get something pushed into your a-hole.
i think it would be best if you just not post here anymore. seriously. :dry:
Why is it so often that people scream "free speech!" when they're busy being offensive? The intent behind free speech was to encourage discourse, not to encourage idiocy.
To get back to the topic ... I think sometimes people have some peculiar notion of what a "gay best friend" would be like in the same way some people have odd notions of what Asian women would be like. Sometimes I think it's an exoticization factor that makes them think this would be cool. :dry:
Napoleon Chynamite
10-16-2003, 04:49 PM
Perhaps one should exercise greater tact when dealing with issues that have the potential to create arguments of the kind that involve hostile exchanges. Unpleasantness stem from misunderstandings and greater degrees of unpleasantness result in unfortunate incidents that cost lives in some places. Free speech is one thing, but to engage in thoughtless and insensitive banter at the expense of an individual or a group of individuals is not what I would term being civil to your neighbour.
In any case, play nicely and users here will be more than happy to reciprocate. :)
Why can't you ever reply like a normal person instead of inserting the top 10 most hated SAT vocabulary words into each one of your posts? Stop reinforcing the smart man Asian stereotype and join the rest of us dumbasses down here who are actually doing some good for Asian Americans. ^^
edit: P.S. or Asian Canadians
Fireblade
10-16-2003, 06:35 PM
To get back to the topic ... I think sometimes people have some peculiar notion of what a "gay best friend" would be like in the same way some people have odd notions of what Asian women would be like. Sometimes I think it's an exoticization factor that makes them think this would be cool. :dry:
I agree. In some ways this is just an excuse to say in a conversation "well I have a gay best friend".
After a while you don't get to really know them besides the label, and really, that's what infuriates me behind getting to know a person because of some certain interest. If you're going to make a friend, do it right. Not because they're of a particular blanket group.
kitty
10-16-2003, 06:47 PM
Why can't you ever reply like a normal person instead of inserting the top 10 most hated SAT vocabulary words into each one of your posts? Stop reinforcing the smart man Asian stereotype and join the rest of us dumbasses down here who are actually doing some good for Asian Americans. ^^
edit: P.S. or Asian Canadians
oh, please... that was beautiful :)
kitty
10-16-2003, 06:48 PM
Hollywood glamorizes being a gay male. Not everyone is Jack from Will and Grace!
I actually have a lot of gay friends from my days in the Bay Area, from school and working. There are assholes and cool guys/girls, just like with everyone else. Too many people stick to stereotypes.
My lesbian friends are for the most part the "butch" type but they arethe coolest and most open people I know. And not all gay guys are in tune with their feminine side. One guy I know is a total slob, knows nothing about skin products or fashion. The only way you'd know he is gay is from the raindow pin he wears walking around in the Castro with his latest boy-toy of the month.
Also, not all guys who are in touch with their feminine side are gay. They might just be metrosexual. LOTS of metrosexuals in Manhattan.
this might be off-topic, but do you think Hollywood really glamourizes gay men? They treat them as an oddity, and I personally would smack an over-the-top Jack rather than hang with him. I want a friend, not a mascot.
Emperor_Mike
10-17-2003, 06:22 AM
Why can't you ever reply like a normal person instead of inserting the top 10 most hated SAT vocabulary words into each one of your posts? Stop reinforcing the smart man Asian stereotype and join the rest of us dumbasses down here who are actually doing some good for Asian Americans. ^^
edit: P.S. or Asian Canadians
It was a normal reply! For me anyway...eh heh heh...:)
vBulletin® v3.7.0, Copyright ©2000-2008, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.