Culturally different from your parents?

[SunWuKong]

do you feel that you are culturally different from your parents? do they do much more "Asian things" than you? if so, how do you feel about that? what does it mean for your future children?

[VV o n g B a]

can't watch chinese opera and i don't view chinese politics thru their eyes. i feel like i'm more willing to go out and have fun but most kids prolly feel that way about their parents. the thing i've felt the most loss over is history. i know nothing about my parents hometowns except the vaguest generalities. i want my kids to be different and know more history but i don't see how that will be possible unless i move to china or something. but then again, i don't want them to pickup on the typical east asian notion that because of their race they are simply better than everyone else. i'm conflicted.

[Emperor_Mike]

No, my parents hold a fine balance between doing Asian things and partaking in Western actions. I'm more or less in the same position as well and we have no troubles whatsoever shifting between our Asian and Caucasian relatives.

As for the kids, they won't soon forget their Chinese heritage, let me tell you. :)

[SunWuKong]

<!--QuoteBegin-VV o n g B a+Jul 17 2003, 12:49 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>QUOTE (VV o n g B a @ Jul 17 2003, 12:49 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> but then again, i don't want them to pickup on the typical east asian notion that because of their race they are simply better than everyone else.&nbsp; i'm conflicted. [/b][/quote]
i don't know about anywhere else, but in HK, the average local usually have an inferiority complex regarding Westerners, so they definitely don't think that they're better because of their race.&nbsp; however, they do look down on darker-skinned peoples.

[AngryABCGirl]

My parents have gotten more and more Americanized than they use to be in the passing years that I look on in a bit of dismay.&nbsp; My family has had a history of being foreigners for about three generations now, being wai sen ren for my grandparents, my parents being wai sen ren and coming to America partially cause of it, and of course be being Chinese-American, I guess we've all been in a constant state of flux that we've all become a little consistently different.&nbsp;

I always wondered what my grandma felt, being the oldest living relative, at seeing her kids turn Taiwanese and having a lot of her grandchildren growing up in white suburbs not even knowing how to speak Mandarin or else if they do it's with a crisp Taiwanese tone, watching her progency turn more and more into foreigners.

My kids are probably gonna be total little "jokl sings" or however you say it in Cantonese ABCs or maybe even Hapas, and become even more foreign to me to as time passes by.

I don't know if I should even really feel sad or not anymore, time changes everything you know?

[AliBabaIncorporated]

Considering how whitewashed my mother is, I don't think it's possible for me to be less Asian than her. But, some of the stuff that's been passed on to me from grandparents and other relatives, it's just not gonna be possible to maintain in the worlds my kids will grow up in. A lot of attitudes, habits, and traditions among my relatives come specifically from being in southeast Asia, and from the infamous Hakka stubbornness against assimilating even with other Chinese people, a lot of which arose from holding onto our language. My kids won't likely have either.

I can probably ensure that my kids grow up as Chinese speakers, of some sort ... it would probably end up being only Mandarin, unless I move back to Malaysia (or HK). But at this point, if I ever spend any significant portion of my life in Asia, Japan or Taiwan is looking a lot more likely.

But culturally? Kids adapt to whatever local youth culture they can fit into. And, to put it bluntly, there is no Hakka youth culture anymore. I grew up surrounded by Hakka speakers cuz the last generation was endogamous enough that lots of cousins all grew up in Hakka-speaking households and spoke Hakka to each other. Now? Hakka people go out and get absorbed by Hokkiens and Cantonese.

And if they grew up in America, they'd be Asian-Americans. No offense but I wouldn't exactly be thrilled by that prospect, even though by now I am pretty Americanized in a lot of my attitudes (which especially gets driven home to me when I talk to other M'sian Chinese about girls or sex or relationships or parents or any other number of subjects).

[SunWuKong]

<!--QuoteBegin-AzNBuffGrL+Jul 21 2003, 02:26 AM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>QUOTE (AzNBuffGrL @ Jul 21 2003, 02:26 AM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> My parents have gotten more and more Americanized than they use to be in the passing years that I look on in a bit of dismay. [/b][/quote]
well i don't really feel "dismay" but my parents are also getting Americanised.&nbsp; a few weeks ago my father actually told me to "just do my best".&nbsp; i was laughing at him and telling him that he's becoming Americanised.&nbsp; he just laughed back.&nbsp;&nbsp; :P

[SunWuKong]

<!--QuoteBegin-AzNBuffGrL+Jul 21 2003, 02:26 AM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>QUOTE (AzNBuffGrL @ Jul 21 2003, 02:26 AM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> My kids are probably gonna be total little "jokl sings" or however you say it in Cantonese ABCs or maybe even Hapas, and become even more foreign to me to as time passes by. [/b][/quote]
there's always the prospect of moving to Taiwan to live, or maybe HK, Singapore, or even mainland China.&nbsp; i personally am hoping that i'd get to raise my kids in HK, and i'd send them to international school.

[Faithless]

<!--QuoteBegin-SunWuKung+Jul 17 2003, 06:08 AM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>QUOTE (SunWuKung @ Jul 17 2003, 06:08 AM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> do you feel that you are culturally different from your parents? do they do much more "Asian things" than you? if so, how do you feel about that? what does it mean for your future children? [/b][/quote]
I think it's just a natural change. My folks have a lot of Japanese ways.

That stuff didn't completely stick to their kids when they came to the states. And I expect that less of it will stick to their grandchildren.