scared of men

[karizma]

>> hey ladies...most of you know i have a problem with being serious lol but on the real now, an incident ocurred last night that shook my faith that there are guys out there who are genuinely nice...my friend was too tired to take me home so he asked a friend of his to take me home...right when i got in the car he grabbed my chest...i yelled at him to stop...he started the car and got a 1/4 mile down the road when he decided to turn around and go back to my friend's house...all the while still grabbing me...and me still screaming for him to stop...we reached my friends house and i ran out of the car him chasing me, threatening to throw me in the pool...he only stopped when i screamed my friend's name and ran up to his room...i ran to my friend and cried...the guy said his goodbye and drove off...i stayed speechless/motionless for about 10 mins...my brain couldnt even begin to register what happened...i didnt know how to react and i still dont...but i feel more helpless than ever...what do you guys think i should do =/...has anyone been in a similar situation? >_<

[SunWuKong]

woh what the hell? this guy is a friend of your friend? that guy needs to be confronted about this incident.

[Arex]

I'm so sorry to hear about your ordeal! How traumatic that must've been! That'd definitely shake my foundation that guys out there are generally good and harmless. 'specially considering that this was your friend's "friend."

I would agree that this dude definitely needs to be confronted. Hopefully by someone as intimidating to him as he must've seemed to you at the time. Technically speaking, that was a form of sexual assault though I don't know what would happen if you were to make a complaint. This guy obviously has a problem so I wouldn't feel too bad about at least inquiring with the cops as to what could be done with the ass...


RX

[kasia]

sorry this happened to you. what...a...bastard.

if the guy has no gang connections, maybe you should consider filing a police report just so that they would investigate him. also so he'll know that actions like that are against the law. maybe he'll think twice before doing that to another girl. if you feel intimidated by it all, call a sexual assault hotline and a counselor will accompany you to file the report. what he did was definitely an assault.

in the alternative, if you don't feel comfortable with going to the cops, find a couple of guys to "have a word with him"--the guy needs to get his ass kicked.

[mrazntre]

aww, poor girl. are you doing okay?

[Arex]

[quote:ca5b474d0e="kasia"]in the alternative, if you don't feel comfortable with going to the cops, find a couple of guys to "have a word with him"--the guy needs to get his ass kicked.[/quote:ca5b474d0e]

I agree 100%. Which actually reminds me of this one incident: my friend knew this girl who was raped by an acquaintance. When he found out who did it, he and a bunch of his friends hunted the guy down and kicked the shit out of him every day 'til he dropped out of school.

Alex

[deez nuts]

I'm glad to hear you're ok though and it didn't get any further than that. Did you tell your friend? Maybe file a report with the cops? But definitely tell your friend. I would at least consult a counselor and maybe file a police report.

You can always send him to NY, me and my boys will show him how us New York boys throw down! But seriously, if you're gonna do something (like file a report, speak to a counselor) do it now, don't wait. You were completely in the right, you were assaulted, plain and simple.

It has nothing to do with nice guys, it's called common decency and respect.

[princess]

aww jae. i hope youre doing alright. im sorry this had to happen to you. im always here for you, girl. ill catch ya later so we can talk, k?

[karizma]

>> thanks for the advice guys >_<...a lot of my friends have volunteered to beat his ass for me but...the guys has some gang affiliation...like his dad is a major dai lo...so as much as id like my friends to beat him senseless...i wouldnt want them getting hurt in the process...i guess the best i can do now is just tell my friends to talk to him about it...=P...either that or fuck up his car and yknow..remove his brakes or something...hmm..

[Saiko]

Aw man. That must've been so scary. Especially being stuck in the car with him and all. Guys can be real jerks. Not all though. It's just that the genuinely nice guys are hard to find. But even they have some jerk in them. Everybody does.
It's pretty scary being a girl sometimes. I was stalked once. And I remember going to some plaza late at night and was waiting for a ride. Lotsa greasy guys there. Some 40-50 year old guy liked to explain to me in a funny accent how I had "nice joogles". What the hell are joogles anyway?! Then some other guys were kinda touchy feely. Disgusted and freaked me out. -_- But I think your situation is worse. Ouch. I'd deck that jerk if I were there. Too bad he has gang affiliations. That could be a big problem.

[CrX3183]

[quote:2e701cd785="karizma"]>> thanks for the advice guys >_<...a lot of my friends have volunteered to beat his ass for me but...the guys has some gang affiliation...like his dad is a major dai lo...so as much as id like my friends to beat him senseless...i wouldnt want them getting hurt in the process...i guess the best i can do now is just tell my friends to talk to him about it...=P...either that or fuck up his car and yknow..remove his brakes or something...hmm..[/quote:2e701cd785]
Oh gee, all it takes is one bomb, if u can get to his car take apart one of his brake lights that is the closest to the gas tank, put the two wires in there and when he steps on the brake he'll light up...

[karizma]

crx: are you for hire? puahaha

[CrX3183]

What do u pay???

[mrazntre]

she pays per gonad.

[artsfartsyjanet]

Originally posted by mrazntre@Jul 31 2002, 04:13 AM
aww, poor girl. are you doing okay?
I know you're trying to be sympathetic, but "poor girl" can be interpreted as "I feel sorry for you." Again, I know you're trying to be kind, but that phrase can be misinterpreted. Just a thought. No hard feelings. :)

[artsfartsyjanet]

Originally posted by karizma@Jul 31 2002, 08:27 PM
>> thanks for the advice guys >_<...a lot of my friends have volunteered to beat his ass for me but...the guys has some gang affiliation...like his dad is a major dai lo...so as much as id like my friends to beat him senseless...i wouldnt want them getting hurt in the process...i guess the best i can do now is just tell my friends to talk to him about it...=P...either that or fuck up his car and yknow..remove his brakes or something...hmm..
Gosh, it must've been traumatic what you went through. Even though he's with a gang, there are ways of getting his ass. Of course, it's also up to you. It's mind boggling how unjust and harmful people can be to other people. unfortunately, it's not easy filing a case of sexual assault when the law depends so much on evidence. But hey, if he's affiliated in a gang, I'm sure there are other legal matters that should get him to pay for his crimes. What an asshole. I was in a similar situation once when I was 17-- over 6 years ago-- but in a different scenario. It's not easy to shake off feelings of being coerced or brought down to feel like a piece of meat. If you ever need to talk, you can always PM me. Take care.



<!--EDIT|artsfartsyjanet|Aug 15 2002, 12:51 PM-->

[golden_buns]

Originally posted by karizma@Jul 30 2002, 07:19 PM
>> hey ladies...most of you know i have a problem with being serious lol but on the real now, an incident ocurred last night that shook my faith that there are guys out there who are genuinely nice...my friend was too tired to take me home so he asked a friend of his to take me home...right when i got in the car he grabbed my chest...i yelled at him to stop...he started the car and got a 1/4 mile down the road when he decided to turn around and go back to my friend's house...all the while still grabbing me...and me still screaming for him to stop...we reached my friends house and i ran out of the car him chasing me, threatening to throw me in the pool...he only stopped when i screamed my friend's name and ran up to his room...i ran to my friend and cried...the guy said his goodbye and drove off...i stayed speechless/motionless for about 10 mins...my brain couldnt even begin to register what happened...i didnt know how to react and i still dont...but i feel more helpless than ever...what do you guys think i should do =/...has anyone been in a similar situation? >_<
something like that happenned to my girlfriend while I was in Costa Rica last month. The guy started to touch her legs so my gf slapped him, and instead apologizing he started to beat her. I tried to find out who he was and where he lived once I got to LA, but she wouldn't tell me a thing. I hope that someday it'll slip outta her mouth so I can go and beat the living shit out of that little fucker

[Cipherous]

what kinda gang?

Triad? Yukaza? some vietnamese, cambodian type ish?

[Deadpool]

Pay a large gruff homosexual, preferably a hairy one, to rape that grabastic jerk.

[blue hoodie]

Originally posted by golden_buns@Jul 6 2003, 08:12 AM
something like that happenned to my girlfriend while I was in Costa Rica last month. The guy started to touch her legs so my gf slapped him, and instead apologizing he started to beat her. I tried to find out who he was and where he lived once I got to LA, but she wouldn't tell me a thing. I hope that someday it'll slip outta her mouth so I can go and beat the living shit out of that little fucker
if you need help, let me know. :pissed:

[Hanuman]

Geez, I'm sorry you had to go through that. Your friend should pummel the crap out of him. I asked a friend of mine to take my girl home for me not too long ago (I was stuck at work) and even though everything was fine, I couldn't help but worry a little bit, and he's one of my boys. He's also one of my students in my Kenpo class, so I knew he was gonna behave, yet I still couldn't help but feel a little aprehensive.

Any chance at all you can involve the cops? He's not gonna really understand that what he did was wrong unless he suffers some sort of consequence for it.

[mr. x]

this is a terrible thing to say karizma but if he has gang affiliation then the only way to get him back is to play his game

you or someone u know should disguise (wear masks and stuff) and THEN beat the shit out of him, he'll never know what (or who) hit him. steal his money to cover your tracks

[Chrysalis]

Oh dear. I'm so sorry you had to go through that. I know everyone just wants to beat the crap out of him but honestly the main thing to do is surround yourself with people who love you. I had a similar thing happen to me once (about 2 years ago) and to this day I still feel aprehensive and cautious. Therapy might help (I'm not being mean ok?). Also tell those closest to you and those who know him. Spread the word about his character. Hope this helps.

[DragonKnight]

<!--QuoteBegin-mr. x+Jul 10 2003, 09:16 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>QUOTE (mr. x @ Jul 10 2003, 09:16 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> this is a terrible thing to say karizma but if he has gang affiliation then the only way to get him back is to play his game

you or someone u know should disguise (wear masks and stuff) and THEN beat the shit out of him, he'll never know what (or who) hit him. steal his money to cover your tracks [/b][/quote]
I have to agree. This is some sick shit that has to be dealt with.

One of my ex's got harassed and almost assaulted while walking from SJSU in the evening. She got home, threw her bags down, and started screaming how she wants to kill some muthafucka that harassed her. I immediately went out side the apartment with wooden sword in hand to cram it down his throat. That's when she told me she chased the fugker off. Yep, she got fed up when the sick perv got too close and she rushed towards him to push him off the bike he was on. She started screaming bloody hell at him on how she's gonna push him off the bike and beat the living shit outta his sorry ass. That's when he pedaled his sorry ass away. She was never harassed again since that night. This is a 5'4", 105lb HK girl with a lotta spirit and take-no-shit attitude.

All I can say is take a stand cause there is no excuse for this shit.

-Rich

[BeTheReds]

<!--QuoteBegin-kasia+Jul 31 2002, 06:08 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>QUOTE (kasia @ Jul 31 2002, 06:08 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> sorry this happened to you. what...a...bastard.

if the guy has no gang connections, maybe you should consider filing a police report just so that they would investigate him. also so he'll know that actions like that are against the law. maybe he'll think twice before doing that to another girl. if you feel intimidated by it all, call a sexual assault hotline and a counselor will accompany you to file the report. what he did was definitely an assault.

in the alternative, if you don't feel comfortable with going to the cops, find a couple of guys to "have a word with him"--the guy needs to get his ass kicked. [/b][/quote]
not wanting to sound totally oblivious and suburban, but what difference does it make if this guy has gang connections?

[kasia]

<!--QuoteBegin-BeTheReds+Jul 15 2003, 08:12 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>QUOTE (BeTheReds @ Jul 15 2003, 08:12 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> <!--QuoteBegin-kasia+Jul 31 2002, 06:08 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>QUOTE (kasia @ Jul 31 2002, 06:08 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> sorry this happened to you.&nbsp; what...a...bastard.

if the guy has no gang connections, maybe you should consider filing a police report just so that they would investigate him.&nbsp; also so he'll know that actions like that are against the law.&nbsp; maybe he'll think twice before doing that to another girl.&nbsp; if you feel intimidated by it all, call a sexual assault hotline and a counselor will accompany you to file the report.&nbsp; what he did was definitely an assault.

in the alternative, if you don't feel comfortable with going to the cops, find a couple of guys to "have a word with him"--the guy needs to get his ass kicked. [/b][/quote]
not wanting to sound totally oblivious and suburban, but what difference does it make if this guy has gang connections? [/b][/quote]
cause they'll find a way to retaliate if she goes to the cops.

[BeTheReds]

<!--QuoteBegin-kasia+Jul 16 2003, 01:32 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>QUOTE (kasia @ Jul 16 2003, 01:32 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> <!--QuoteBegin-BeTheReds+Jul 15 2003, 08:12 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>QUOTE (BeTheReds @ Jul 15 2003, 08:12 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> <!--QuoteBegin-kasia+Jul 31 2002, 06:08 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>QUOTE (kasia @ Jul 31 2002, 06:08 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> sorry this happened to you. what...a...bastard.

if the guy has no gang connections, maybe you should consider filing a police report just so that they would investigate him. also so he'll know that actions like that are against the law. maybe he'll think twice before doing that to another girl. if you feel intimidated by it all, call a sexual assault hotline and a counselor will accompany you to file the report. what he did was definitely an assault.

in the alternative, if you don't feel comfortable with going to the cops, find a couple of guys to "have a word with him"--the guy needs to get his ass kicked. [/b][/quote]
not wanting to sound totally oblivious and suburban, but what difference does it make if this guy has gang connections? [/b][/quote]
cause they'll find a way to retaliate if she goes to the cops. [/b][/quote]
Oh great!

[mrazntre]

<!--QuoteBegin-golden_buns+Jul 6 2003, 04:12 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>QUOTE (golden_buns @ Jul 6 2003, 04:12 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> something like that happenned to my girlfriend while I was in Costa Rica last month. The guy started to touch her legs so my gf slapped him, and instead apologizing he started to beat her. I tried to find out who he was and where he lived once I got to LA, but she wouldn't tell me a thing. I hope that someday it'll slip outta her mouth so I can go and beat the living shit out of that little fucker [/b][/quote]
why won't your chick tell you who it is? why does she need to hide the truth from you? i hate when women do that..... i'd prolly just break up with her if i was you... i can't stand that shit.