White-washed: An Identity Issue?

[Pb2308]

hey guys, i just joined this forum recently. browsed around and realized that the common view towards those white-washed or w/e is negative. that such asians are getting away from their culture/identity, because their skin color should ultimately define their personality?

theres a lot of variables on why an asian becomes white-washed. but before i get into that, i have a gripe on the term "white-washed". that term makes it seem that those white-washed are just trying to be white. because they think that white is "better". i think thats something we can agree on as an asian community--that its pathetic to put white on a pedestal. how about the term, americanized?

and what do you guys mean by that anyway? if you play non-asian sports such as football, you're white-washed? if you happen to have white-friends, you're white washed? so since i grew up in a white town my whole life, and basically assimilated...i have major identity issues? what was i to do? forcefully make friends with just the asians...because i was? isolate myself? thats what creates stereotypes guys. the more mysteries we leave to non-asians, the more they jump to conclusions. we're all the same. don't think the white-asian dude is trying to fit in/trying to be more white. maybe those kids he hangs out with are just good people, cool kids. friends mimic each other.

we should open ourselves up. you guys that stick to yourselves, you're missing out on a lot of great people. why else are we here? but you know, i guess i take for granted that i've been here 17 some odd years. its a slow process for sure.

but you know what. maybe i'm completely wrong. maybe i do have an identity issue. i want out. i want to be totally asian again. what do i do? what is that?

Discuss.

[tripostrophe]

Yo Pb, check my reply to your similar question in the other post.

First, skin color obviously shouldn't define a person wholly, but as long as we live in a society in which people make judgments based on this and other factors, simply pretending it isn't an issue won't make it go away. Of course, that still doesn't mean that one part of a person should shape their personality. For an in-depth, reasoned discussion of this, check out Yellow by Frank Wu.

I don't know if white-washed has an official definition, at least around these forums. But it is true that the term is often used in a disparaging manner (as a counterpart to FOB, sometimes). The way I see it however, the strict definition of it is simply assimilated into white culture. Any other heritage/culture is either lost or completely ignored (thus the "washed" part of it, as in painting (or whitewashing) over something).

Americanized...the problem with that term is there with the term "whitewashed" as well -- you have to define what "American" and "white" are. The way discussions go in this country, the two are often perceived as being one and the same, but obviously they're not. I suppose whitewashed then is usually used with people who fit the above definition -- assimilated, at the cost of whatever they had before.

I don't think it's always as negative as calling someone a straight up "sellout" however -- though it seems that this term is reserved more for females, rather than males (sexism). It's like the difference between a friend kind of ragging on you for not noticing them at a party vs. accusing you of intentionally ignoring them.

I forget what thread you posted in, but yeah a lot of people seem to think that certain activities and such are "white." The reasons that they are perceived as such vary however. Simply, it's the acceptance of stereotypes, but in certain situations the stereotypes may have developed due to things that keep the stereotypes in place.

For example; certain sports, types of music, theater, etc. may be perceived as "white" activities because that's what the majority of participants are. Sometimes though, it's like that because there's not enough active "recruitment" of others -- if you're the average person, with at least a few stereotypes guiding your decisions, you're probably going to see a scrawny Asian kid as a hopeless frail nerd, while you may see a bit of potential in a similar white candidate.

And the vast majority of plays are NOT very friendly grounds for minorities -- especially when the roles are written (explicitly or implicitly) for white actors/leads. Again, the average person is going to find something a bit "off" about a Black, Asian, or Latino taking the role of Raul in Phantom, George Washington in some historical play, etc. yeah? They might not be written off right away, but if there's a similarly (or perhaps even a little less) skilled actor who is white, then "logic dictates that they should be chosen," right? Because we all know George Washington wasn't Black...and how can an opera set in (somewhere in Europe long ago) have any non-white characters? Just doesn't seem to fit with the setting...

Of course, on the flip side of that, very few people seem to have a problem with stories about white people in some exotic far-off land, or always seeing Jesus portrayed by white actors.

Your situation is quite understandable though, and don't expect us to jump down your throat for not knowing how to speak your mother tongue or anything. A lot of people find themselves in similar situations. We don't expect you to be Mr. Friend to every Asian/Pacific Islander American (APIA) you meet, and it's cool as long as you're not purposefully avoiding them.

Interesting that you should talk about opening up, "expanding our horizons" when it comes to our friends, so to speak. Now, I'm not accusing you of this, just want you to take this into consideration: judging from your statement, you probably infer bias in our choices of who we choose to hang out with, and make friends with. Something that's always good to do is to turn that around, and put it onto your situation.

Sometimes, people coming from a similar place as you might subconsciously be letting a bias play out, which prevents you from making too many APIA friends. Of course, you may not purposefully avoid them, but it may turn out that you just don't seem to "click" with other Asians. Legitimate factors may play a part in this (if your cultures, interests, etc. are really that widely different -- though there's always common ground between any people), but there also may be a discomfort at being seen as "self-segregationist" by your non-Asian friends which keeps you from getting too close to other APIAs. (If I start hanging out with this guy too much, they may think I'm becoming like all the other Asians who only hang out with each other and etc.). Just something to be mindful of. Especially because there's a tendency for such actions to be seen as self-segregating, and we all know it. Whereas when you make friends with non Asian people, it's seen as "normal," so there's less to think about and be self conscious about when you try and establish those relationships.

Haha, and don't buy into things like "totally Asian." The Asian/Pacific Islander (Indian)-American identity is one that's still being hammered out. Eating rice, speaking whatever language, x fashion and y preferences doesn't make you Asian/APIA. What we're about (I think) is just being down for the cause, e.g. helping each other out wherever we need it. A lot of it is political empowerment, positive media portrayals, general education and raising awareness. Building community. So yeah, no worries. Hope this helped. Anyone else feel free to contribute, and feel free to point out anything you might be having trouble with.

hey guys, i just joined this forum recently. browsed around and realized that the common view towards those white-washed or w/e is negative. that such asians are getting away from their culture/identity, because their skin color should ultimately define their personality?

theres a lot of variables on why an asian becomes white-washed. but before i get into that, i have a gripe on the term "white-washed". that term makes it seem that those white-washed are just trying to be white. because they think that white is "better". i think thats something we can agree on as an asian community--that its pathetic to put white on a pedestal. how about the term, americanized?

and what do you guys mean by that anyway? if you play non-asian sports such as football, you're white-washed? if you happen to have white-friends, you're white washed? so since i grew up in a white town my whole life, and basically assimilated...i have major identity issues? what was i to do? forcefully make friends with just the asians...because i was? isolate myself? thats what creates stereotypes guys. the more mysteries we leave to non-asians, the more they jump to conclusions. we're all the same. don't think the white-asian dude is trying to fit in/trying to be more white. maybe those kids he hangs out with are just good people, cool kids. friends mimic each other.

we should open ourselves up. you guys that stick to yourselves, you're missing out on a lot of great people. why else are we here? but you know, i guess i take for granted that i've been here 17 some odd years. its a slow process for sure.

but you know what. maybe i'm completely wrong. maybe i do have an identity issue. i want out. i want to be totally asian again. what do i do? what is that?

Discuss.

[Pb2308]

man, you're def on point with all this stuff. thanks for the response btw. haha yeah the totally asian thing was sarcasm, to imply that such is still being defined. i like what you said about that subconscious bias of whom we choose to hang out with. i've been guilty of that. iits just the past year or two where i realized "what the hell am i thinking" and let all that nonsense go. because when it comes to girls, asians are number one! haha. two of my best friends are asian--i guess theyre whitewashed also. but when were ragin we go to the asian parties and do some damage haha.

thanks for the imput man. you really know what you're talking about. i def want to pick up that book.

[tripostrophe]

Hey, no problem. And just a forewarning -- the book is written by a lawyer (I believe). So even though it's very informative and all, it can get a bit dry sometimes. Still a good book, but yeah.

[JesusIsmyFriend]

I think Americanized and White-Washed are two totally different terms. When someone says "American" it all depends on how you see it and how you view it. Obviously the majority in this country is "White" so a lot of people do picture a white person when they say American. However, most people who understand the definition of American...it really simply means a Nationality.

Anyone who lives in a certain country eventually needs to assimilate, whether that's through learning the native language or learning the customs within the country. I think the main issue with "White-Washed" is being ashamed and in denial of your own race. There's things such as having eyelid surgery, being ashamed of speaking your language, dating outside your own race that can be seen as "white-washed" or preference. We all know a person's environment has a large part to do with their upbringing, but I think it's how it effects the person that truly defines what is white-washed. I think I can say some of my cousins are more close-minded than White-Washed, I have a female cousins who blatantly says that "Asians are ugly". But that is do in part because of what she sees on Television & the people she interacts with.

I'm not sure how not playing a "Asian" sport would make you white-washed. What are "Asian sports?"...Ping Pong & Tae Kwon Do?
I thought playing sports would more or less just make you a jock. There's not many Asians in sports to begin with so if you're playing sports, I would've assumed you would have broken that Asian stereotype that Asians are all nerdy and study all day. Not to mention the most popular sports in the US ...football, baseball, and basketball are either diverse or dominated by African-Americans so that kind of kills the whole White-Washed idea as well.

At the end of the day, I think White-washed is more of the brainwashing and creating a idea that being non-white makes that person inferior.