Hapas and your siblings

[Hiroshi2]

OK, here's a topic: do any of the other hapas find that their siblings (who are also hapa) seem to identify differently from you, or maybe looks more asian or non-asian compared to you?

My sister looks more japanese, and people always say she looks like my mom. I don't know if she identifies more japanese or black or mixed or whatever though.

[kimpossible]

My sis was raised primarily by my dad and I was raised by my mom. We have a lot of personal traits in common, but culturally we're very different. She understands very little, if anything, about any Asian culture and has no intentions of learning Japanese or meeting our family in Japan.

I'm not sure how I look. I think a lot of people now think I'm French-Indian, though when I was younger it was pretty obvious that was part Asian. My sister looks hispanic/latin. Many people will come up to her and start speaking Spanish.

[thaite]

Middle brother is darker than I am and looks most Asian out of us three, though people have mistaken him for hispanic or native American. Suffers from denial in regards to ethnicity, doesn't identify as Asian except for the most superficial trappings (food, etc.). He doesn't really care much for other Asians or AAs.

Youngest bro looks like a dark-skinned Mediterranean European. Doesn't mind being around other Asians, but he doesn't have any Asian friends nor does he go out of his way to find them either. He identifies as Asian-American, but really doesn't know a great deal about Thai culture, although he did become a monk for a short time per the tradition (which I and the middle bro did not do).

I don't know how I look anymore, but you can look at the avatar.

[noriko]

hmm...interesting question. I have cousins who are fluent in Japanese and moved back there permanently, and on the other extreme i have cousins who can pass for white and are happy they can do so. My little brother i think identifies more with the chinese side of our family, even though we don't even really know those relatives at all.... eg he has the chinese flag hanging in his room, and hangs with a chinese-american crowd. but, he still knows a bit of japanese, and has respect for the culture and traditions.

[Hiroshi2]

Oh yeah just to jump to cousins real quick, I've got some who are white/japanese. Don't know 'em well enough to know how they identify though.

[AliBabaIncorporated]

My sis was raised primarily by my dad's parents. can't speak chinese. her French is really good though. she looks more obviously Asian than me, but she only identifies as non-white for the purpose of some political issues.

[SunWuKong]

Originally posted by noriko@Nov 28 2002, 10:42 PM
hmm...interesting question. I have cousins who are fluent in Japanese and moved back there permanently, and on the other extreme i have cousins who can pass for white and are happy they can do so. My little brother i think identifies more with the chinese side of our family, even though we don't even really know those relatives at all.... eg he has the chinese flag hanging in his room, and hangs with a chinese-american crowd. but, he still knows a bit of japanese, and has respect for the culture and traditions.
i'm really interested to see what your household is like. your entire immediate family is hapa. that must be interesting.

[maldito]

Originally posted by Hiroshi2@Nov 28 2002, 09:18 PM
OK, here's a topic: do any of the other hapas find that their siblings (who are also hapa) seem to identify differently from you, or maybe looks more asian or non-asian compared to you?

I'm sure alot has to do w/ how they look compared to yourself. It always seems that the grass is greener on the other side. So if your sibling looks less white than Asian, they might try to identify with their white side more, and vice versa. And most importantly where you grew up has alot to do with how one identifies themself.

[Hiroshi2]

Originally posted by maldito@Nov 29 2002, 02:09 PM
Originally posted by Hiroshi2@Nov 28 2002, 09:18 PM
OK, here's a topic: do any of the other hapas find that their siblings (who are also hapa) seem to identify differently from you, or maybe looks more asian or non-asian compared to you?

I'm sure alot has to do w/ how they look compared to yourself. It always seems that the grass is greener on the other side. So if your sibling looks less white than Asian, they might try to identify with their white side more, and vice versa. And most importantly where you grew up has alot to do with how one identifies themself.
Well, we grew up in an inner-city black neighborhood where the only asians were some kids down the street from us whose mom was half-Filipino. And except for that family, a Puerto Rican boy who also lived in the area, and our mom, everyone else was black. So I guess you could say we had no trouble developing a black identity. And now that I think about it, my sister probably does identify more as black than i do, even though she looks more asian. I don't think, for example, that she has ever made an effort to learn the language like I have. But then again, she's a bit young and she may realize how important it all is when she gets older.

[maldito]

And now that I think about it, my sister probably does identify more as black than i do, even though she looks more asian.

Didn't realize what you were mixed with. My younger brother is black. We have the same mother, different fathers. Remember what I said how we tend to associate ourself with the side that we don't look like? Well, my brother looks black, esp. if you mix a black person with someone who is filipino and hawaiian mixed....but my brother likes to be very "Hawaiian". So do I and I KNOW I don't look as hawaiian as my other brothers and sister who I know for a fact don't try to be so Hawaiian. *L* So I guess I was right. :)

[Hiroshi2]

Is that photo in your avatar? If it is, i must say, you could easily pass for black. I'm about that same skin color, maybe a bit lighter. I kinda have a light-skinned, black/yellowish color, so people just think i'm light-skinned black.....

oh yeah not to mention a 'fro........ :P

I think you could pass for hawaiian judging by the pic, well sort of. ;)

[maldito]

Originally posted by Hiroshi2@Nov 30 2002, 03:40 AM
Is that photo in your avatar? If it is, i must say, you could easily pass for black. I'm about that same skin color, maybe a bit lighter. I kinda have a light-skinned, black/yellowish color, so people just think i'm light-skinned black.....

oh yeah not to mention a 'fro........ :P

I think you could pass for hawaiian judging by the pic, well sort of. ;)
Yup, that's me. I had other pics. where I had more wavy, curly hair and also one that looked like an afro. I thought I posted it here.

I've been mistaken for black in the past. Everything from Black, Puerto Rican, Latino (in general), Persian (??? *L*), Tongan, Brazilian and Malaysian.

Some people aren't aware of what a Hawaiian should look like or more so not accostumed to seeing typical ethnic combinations in Hawai'i to a point where you tend to have the same look. So it depends on what one sees.

http://mondoy.com/hair.jpg

Different stages of my earlier part of life. *L* My hairstyles that is.

[Hiroshi2]

In the first one you look like what I would expect a Filipino or another southeast asian to look like. You kinda look like Prince in the others though, lol :P j/k

[maldito]

Originally posted by Hiroshi2@Nov 30 2002, 11:40 PM
In the first one you look like what I would expect a Filipino or another southeast asian to look like. You kinda look like Prince in the others though, lol :P  j/k
The one w/ the red background I call my "Prince" shot, but some other friends and people who have seen it for the first time mentioned "El Debarge". *LOL*

I also have a pic. of myself when I was bald. *L* Now I keep my hair pretty much like it was when it was bald. But this is my best bald pic.

<img src='http://home.earthlink.net/~motuahina/kii/kal1.jpg[/img]

[SunWuKong]

woh! you do look like prince in that shot!!! :o :blink: :lol:

[maldito]

Originally posted by SunWuKung@Dec 1 2002, 04:04 AM
woh! you do look like prince in that shot!!! :o :blink: :lol:
:rolleyes:
:lol:

[BeTheReds]

I think the grass is always greener theory has some weight to it.

I look white and I clearly identify with my Korean side, I am sure you all realise that from my posts.

My younger brother looks very Korean and in his circle of all white friends, he is "the korean". He hates being referred to as Korean and he hates the attention he gets from Asian girls cuz he likes white girls only. He hates the fact that asian american dudes try to befriend him like they have some kinda bond because of race when they have absolutly nothing in common with him other than race. He's in the US Army. He affirms that the USA would be better off if the south won the civil war. He is the proudest citizen of Maryland I have ever known, flies the Maryland flag on any occasion in which it is proper to. He is all for stopping immigration.

Then there is my older brother who looks kinda asian, but not really, and just chooses not to embrace either one. My circle of asian friends were really annoyed with him. My brother's circle of white friends thought he was really weird. He is kinda... well... not antisocial, but the sensitive guy. Very intellegent, Mac Geek... Definately not very popular, but all who know him really really love him.

[YuheiCarreau]

I look white and I clearly identify with my Korean side, I am sure you all realise that from my posts.
My younger brother looks very Korean and in his circle of all white friends, he is "the korean". He hates being referred to as Korean and he hates the attention he gets from Asian girls cuz he likes white girls only. He hates the fact that asian american dudes try to befriend him like they have some kinda bond because of race when they have absolutly nothing in common with him other than race. He's in the US Army. He affirms that the USA would be better off if the south won the civil war. He is the proudest citizen of Maryland I have ever known, flies the Maryland flag on any occasion in which it is proper to. He is all for stopping immigration.
Then there is my older brother who looks kinda asian, but not really, and just chooses not to embrace either one. My circle of asian friends were really annoyed with him. My brother's circle of white friends thought he was really weird. He is kinda... well... not antisocial, but the sensitive guy. Very intellegent, Mac Geek... Definately not very popular, but all who know him really really love him.


My roommate is Chinese American, with FOB parents, but doesn't identify as Chinese at all. He even lived in Taiwan for two years as a teenager without learning any Chinese. Lives for videogames and computers, completely clueless about anything else (except for economics). He told me once, "I'm not really Chinese, I'm pretty White!"... To which I replied, "No man, I'm White; you're just uncultured!"

BTR, your family has produced a Confederate, a Geek, and a born-again Korean :lol: . No sisters? What do your parents identify as?

[BeTheReds]

No sisters. My mom identifies herself as American and my father identifies himself as neither Korean nor American, because he always bitches about the social problems that both countries have and feels as if he really doesn't fit in either one anymore. Tho he can't seem to stay in one place and is always flying back and forth.

[blkazngirl]

The one w/ the red background I call my "Prince" shot, but some other friends and people who have seen it for the first time mentioned "El Debarge".

All I can think is, "Little red covette........" Only kidding, specially love that pic of you when you was a kid.

[maldito]

All I can think is, "Little red covette........" Only kidding, specially love that pic of you when you was a kid.

:lol:

Thanks!