your appearance (part ii)

[kasia]

in the other thread, some girls (like jenax and saiko) stated that "no matter how happy they were with their appearance, they could always find something wrong." other girls stated that, essentially, they are satisfied with how they look because they come to terms with it. it seems like none of us are genuinely content with how we look. what are we striving for? and have any of you ever thought about embracing your weaknesses? (<-- i heard that on maury the other day when he had "freak-kids" on his show :) )

[Saiko]

Sometimes I really don't care what I look like. When I'm a bad mood, I have a problem with it. I feel below average. Disgusted. But not many people know that, because I act like I don't give a shit 24/7.

[kasia]

sometimes i would be very happy about the way i look; sometimes i'll have a bad hair day or a zit and not want to go out because of it. i guess i'm extreme.

[angel nympho]

I've come to terms with the fact that I can't change anything, and the things I CAN sort of change, I don't even bother anymore. Some days are better than others, and reaffirmation from people helps :)

I think generally, everybody wishes they were perfect. But in reality, if everyone were perfect, the world would be weird. I've even heard from guys that they don't like a girl to be supermodel pretty. They say that it's those cute little imperfections that are endearing.

[kasia]

Originally posted by angel nympho@Oct 5 2002, 08:55 PM
They say that it's those cute little imperfections that are endearing.
that's good to know....but then...what sorts of imperfections are seen as cute?

[karizma]

>> i got freckles...guys say its cute but they just bug me cause i have this obsession with having perfectly clear skin [which ive yet to achieve]

>> i think a lot of girls strive for supermodel pretty because they read those damn magazines and wish they looked like them...what they dont know is they spend mucho bucks on stylists, makeup artists, and their pics are airbrushed...so dammit...its like we're expected to look this way on our own and its damn near impossible

>> i wish i could look at myself in the mirror and not see imperfections but geez nobody's perfect, im thankful for the little imperfections 'cause they keep my head from swelling up to the size of a hot air balloon...:D

[kasia]

Originally posted by karizma@Oct 5 2002, 10:38 PM
>> i think a lot of girls strive for supermodel pretty because they read those damn magazines and wish they looked like them...what they dont know is they spend mucho bucks on stylists, makeup artists, and their pics are airbrushed...so dammit...its like we're expected to look this way on our own and its damn near impossible
that's what people say, but here in l.a., i've run into quite a few models and they really are pretty without all the make-up, etc.

[karizma]

>> damn well...good genes man...good genes...

>> me and my friend made up this test called the "firehose test", if you can be sprayed in the face with a firehose and still look decent you're officially pretty...of course...we havent had many chances to test this out since yknow...not many firehoses lying around much less people willing to be sprayed by one 0_o..

>> denno man..the standards of beauty are being raised higher and higher...marilyn monroe could have been considered fat if you compared her to today's super model's...*eek*...i guess women are trying to keep up with the crowd =/

[deez nuts]

Originally posted by kasia@Oct 5 2002, 05:43 PM
Originally posted by karizma@Oct 5 2002, 10:38 PM
>> i think a lot of girls strive for supermodel pretty because they read those damn magazines and wish they looked like them...what they dont know is they spend mucho bucks on stylists, makeup artists, and their pics are airbrushed...so dammit...its like we're expected to look this way on our own and its damn near impossible
that's what people say, but here in l.a., i've run into quite a few models and they really are pretty without all the make-up, etc.
Imperfections in a woman can be sexy.

I'm with kasia, less is more with the make up.

[kasia]

Originally posted by karizma@Oct 5 2002, 10:50 PM
>> me and my friend made up this test called the "firehose test", if you can be sprayed in the face with a firehose and still look decent you're officially pretty...of course...we havent had many chances to test this out since yknow...not many firehoses lying around much less people willing to be sprayed by one 0_o..

:lol: cute. only if you really did get sprayed with a firehose, your face will get smashed in. isn't that thing pretty strong?

[kasia]

Originally posted by karizma@Oct 5 2002, 10:38 PM
>> i got freckles...guys say its cute but they just bug me cause i have this obsession with having perfectly clear skin [which ive yet to achieve]
i used to lie out in the sun everyday just so that i get freckles. grass really is greener on the other side.

[karizma]

>> *shrugs* guess freckles give you a unique quality if your asian?

>> really? firehoses smash ur face in? but ive seen it on tv so many times...all you gotta do is stand up against a wall so you dont fly away ahahha...maybe a garden hose would be better ;)

[angel nympho]

Originally posted by kasia@Oct 5 2002, 10:30 PM
Originally posted by angel nympho@Oct 5 2002, 08:55 PM
They say that it's those cute little imperfections that are endearing.
that's good to know....but then...what sorts of imperfections are seen as cute?
My boy thinks the fact that I got a little extra meat on my frame is cute and sexy as hell. And that I've got this hip bone thing... where it kinda sticks out so you can see the outline of it. He says he LOVES it when girls get that. Personally, I wish it weren't there so I could slim down a bit in the hip/waist area.

[kimpossible]

Originally posted by kasia@Oct 5 2002, 02:53 PM
Originally posted by karizma@Oct 5 2002, 10:38 PM
>> i got freckles...guys say its cute but they just bug me cause i have this obsession with having perfectly clear skin [which ive yet to achieve]
i used to lie out in the sun everyday just so that i get freckles. grass really is greener on the other side.
Now that boggles my mind. I've always tried to get rid of my freckles. :D

On the question on always finding something wrong (part deux) and the previous appearance topic: I have American, Japanese and Chinese beauty standards that I'm scrutinized under. Maybe it's the third cultural standard that broke the camel's back, but I finally came to the conclusion that no matter how I look or what I do I'm not going to please everybody. So I do basics to be presentable. Good hairdresser, stay preened/slim and don't wear dumpy clothing. Streamlined makeup when necessary. Around the house and my husband I don't wear any.

In the end, I'd rather be tearing down a trail on a dirt bike, cooking something yummy, playing a video game or spending QT w/ Mr. HH than spend a lot of time pondering my physical imperfections.

[tapestrybabe]

you know what gets to me... the photos that i've seen of all you females... personally speaking, i think you're all beautiful looking.... yet, your still complaining about this and that...

and i'll confess... i dont think i'm that pretty looking compared to all the females here.... i mean, its not as if i turn a lot of guys heads or whateverz.... so, if you females are unsatisfied about this and that... than i feel, i must have a whole helluva lot to be unsatisifed about... dunno... i just find it weird.. that when i see a pretty face... that they're still complaining about this and that...

but anyways, i really dont go out of my way to try to make myself look pretty.. like i dont wear make up and all that... altho i admit, i could lose a little bit of weight tho...



<!--EDIT|tapestrybabe|Oct 6 2002, 02:23 AM-->

[kasia]

Originally posted by tapestrybabe@Oct 6 2002, 05:00 AM
you know what gets to me... the photos that i've seen of all you females... personally speaking, i think you're all beautiful looking.... yet, your still complaining about this and that...

and i'll confess... i dont think i'm that pretty looking compared to all the females here.... i mean, its not as if i turn a lot of guys heads or whateverz.... so, if you females are unsatisfied about this and that... than i feel, i must have a whole helluva lot to be unsatisifed about... dunno... i just find it weird.. that when i see a pretty face... that they're still complaining about this and that...

but anyways, i really dont go out of my way to try to make myself look pretty.. like i dont wear make up and all that... altho i admit, i could lose a little bit of weight tho...
that's kinda my point. it's usually the case that, no matter how pretty a girl may be, ultimately she won't be able to say, "i am *so* happy/content/satisfied with my appearance. even if she's gorgeous. there seems, to me, to be something fundamentally wrong or at least unhealthy with that. and while you may be doubting yourself, tb, there's probably many out there as well that are wondering why would be.

[mydnyht]

It's just one of those things... my mind is automatically set for 'negative'. I could be the most gorgeous person in the universe and still think I was butt-ugly. I think it comes from our need of perfection, so that people will love us, and that we fear we are not loved..

[princess]

Originally posted by mydnyht@Oct 15 2002, 11:43 PM
It's just one of those things... my mind is automatically set for 'negative'. I could be the most gorgeous person in the universe and still think I was butt-ugly.
yeah i can be reallie down on my appearance too. i have some friends that try to tell me they think im beautiful/pretty, etc but i never listen to them. its hard for me to accept myself let alone their opinions. unhealthy? of course. no matter how many times they tell me that they dont think im ugly i still will filter that out. but like karizma said..at least it keeps me grounded.

[angel nympho]

*Scratches head* I hope I'm not coming off as arrogant, 'cuz I'm really not. I think I'm way prettier than I really am. And then I get little reality checks every now and then when I realize that most people don't see it that way. :blink:

[SunWuKong]

Originally posted by angel nympho@Oct 18 2002, 04:25 PM
*Scratches head* I hope I'm not coming off as arrogant, 'cuz I'm really not. I think I'm way prettier than I really am. And then I get little reality checks every now and then when I realize that most people don't see it that way. :blink:
hahhah isn't that kind of oxymoronic? i mean... you think you're way prettier than you actually am... so by virtue of the fact that you realize you are actually not as pretty as you are, doesn't that mean you don't think you're that pretty?

[kimpossible]

Originally posted by angel nympho@Oct 18 2002, 01:25 PM
*Scratches head* I hope I'm not coming off as arrogant, 'cuz I'm really not. I think I'm way prettier than I really am. And then I get little reality checks every now and then when I realize that most people don't see it that way. :blink:
No Sarah, you are definitely pretty. And smart. I think it's good for women to have confidence. I do think what you have is confidence, not arrogance.

[SunWuKong]

Originally posted by Hello_Hapa@Oct 18 2002, 06:08 PM
Originally posted by angel nympho@Oct 18 2002, 01:25 PM
*Scratches head* &nbsp;I hope I'm not coming off as arrogant, 'cuz I'm really not. &nbsp;I think I'm way prettier than I really am. &nbsp;And then I get little reality checks every now and then when I realize that most people don't see it that way. &nbsp; :blink:
No Sarah, you are definitely pretty. And smart. I think it's good for women to have confidence. I do think what you have is confidence, not arrogance.
yes i agree with momma hen :)

[angel nympho]

Originally posted by SunWuKung@Oct 18 2002, 10:18 PM
Originally posted by angel nympho@Oct 18 2002, 04:25 PM
*Scratches head* &nbsp;I hope I'm not coming off as arrogant, 'cuz I'm really not. &nbsp;I think I'm way prettier than I really am. &nbsp;And then I get little reality checks every now and then when I realize that most people don't see it that way. &nbsp; :blink:
hahhah isn't that kind of oxymoronic? i mean... you think you're way prettier than you actually am... so by virtue of the fact that you realize you are actually not as pretty as you are, doesn't that mean you don't think you're that pretty?
Hahhaaha, now I'm REALLY confused. =x

When I'm all getting ready to go out, I'm like "SHIT I look good." And then when I get where I'm going I'm like, "why doesn't anybody think I look good?!? Damn you! Why don't you see it????" Hahaha... so it's not me REALIZING I am not as pretty as I thought.. it's me realizing that OTHER PEOPLE don't think I'm as pretty as I think I do. or... something...

[angel nympho]

Originally posted by Hello_Hapa@Oct 18 2002, 11:08 PM
Originally posted by angel nympho@Oct 18 2002, 01:25 PM
*Scratches head* &nbsp;I hope I'm not coming off as arrogant, 'cuz I'm really not. &nbsp;I think I'm way prettier than I really am. &nbsp;And then I get little reality checks every now and then when I realize that most people don't see it that way. &nbsp; :blink:
No Sarah, you are definitely pretty. And smart. I think it's good for women to have confidence. I do think what you have is confidence, not arrogance.
:dance:

Boosts my ego some more. I LOVE YOUU!!! And you too SWK! You can be my cheerleaders! Come on, I need the perfect cheer!

[karizma]

>> wow this all sounds so familiar...

>> id be having a conversation with girls about appearance and suddenly theyre calling themselves ugly. do i reassure them that they arent? nope. i dont say a damn thing. because the chick is either searching for 2 things a] she knows she's pretty and just wants a compliment or b] she really doesnt think she's pretty and needs reassurance....and ive realized that no matter how much i compliment the latter she'll never be satisfied because she herself think she's ugly and nothing i say will matter. so pfft why waste my breath.

>> everyone feels ugly sometimes...i look in the mirror somedays and wish i was in someone else's body. but eh... im stuck with the one ive got so i live with it :D.

[deez nuts]

Originally posted by angel nympho@Oct 18 2002, 04:25 PM
*Scratches head* I hope I'm not coming off as arrogant, 'cuz I'm really not. I think I'm way prettier than I really am. And then I get little reality checks every now and then when I realize that most people don't see it that way. :blink:
You is fine, now come here. nevermind you is too far :cry:

[SunWuKong]

Originally posted by angel nympho@Oct 18 2002, 06:30 PM
Originally posted by SunWuKung@Oct 18 2002, 10:18 PM
Originally posted by angel nympho@Oct 18 2002, 04:25 PM
*Scratches head* I hope I'm not coming off as arrogant, 'cuz I'm really not. I think I'm way prettier than I really am. And then I get little reality checks every now and then when I realize that most people don't see it that way. :blink:
hahhah isn't that kind of oxymoronic? i mean... you think you're way prettier than you actually am... so by virtue of the fact that you realize you are actually not as pretty as you are, doesn't that mean you don't think you're that pretty?
Hahhaaha, now I'm REALLY confused. =x

When I'm all getting ready to go out, I'm like "SHIT I look good." And then when I get where I'm going I'm like, "why doesn't anybody think I look good?!? Damn you! Why don't you see it????" Hahaha... so it's not me REALIZING I am not as pretty as I thought.. it's me realizing that OTHER PEOPLE don't think I'm as pretty as I think I do. or... something...
oh i see... erm... what makes you think they don't think you're as pretty as you think you are?

[angel nympho]

Originally posted by SunWuKung@Oct 18 2002, 11:56 PM
Originally posted by angel nympho@Oct 18 2002, 06:30 PM
Originally posted by SunWuKung@Oct 18 2002, 10:18 PM
Originally posted by angel nympho@Oct 18 2002, 04:25 PM
*Scratches head* I hope I'm not coming off as arrogant, 'cuz I'm really not. I think I'm way prettier than I really am. And then I get little reality checks every now and then when I realize that most people don't see it that way. :blink:
hahhah isn't that kind of oxymoronic? i mean... you think you're way prettier than you actually am... so by virtue of the fact that you realize you are actually not as pretty as you are, doesn't that mean you don't think you're that pretty?
Hahhaaha, now I'm REALLY confused. =x

When I'm all getting ready to go out, I'm like "SHIT I look good." And then when I get where I'm going I'm like, "why doesn't anybody think I look good?!? Damn you! Why don't you see it????" Hahaha... so it's not me REALIZING I am not as pretty as I thought.. it's me realizing that OTHER PEOPLE don't think I'm as pretty as I think I do. or... something...
oh i see... erm... what makes you think they don't think you're as pretty as you think you are?
Haha, Karizma's right. Girls are either looking for reassurance or fishing for compliments. I need reassurance. I hate it when people think I'm pretty and don't say anything. How am i supposed to know??? Hahaha, Okay, I sound so arrogant. =x

If I wasn't me, I'd oogle over me. I'd like to be oogled over every now and then!!! I'm not saying all the time.. just once a week or something. Hahaha!!! And NO the internet doesn't count!

[ChairmanMah]

Originally posted by tapestrybabe@Oct 6 2002, 05:00 AM
you know what gets to me... the photos that i've seen of all you females... personally speaking, i think you're all beautiful looking.... yet, your still complaining about this and that...

and i'll confess... i dont think i'm that pretty looking compared to all the females here.... i mean, its not as if i turn a lot of guys heads or whateverz.... so, if you females are unsatisfied about this and that... than i feel, i must have a whole helluva lot to be unsatisifed about... dunno... i just find it weird.. that when i see a pretty face... that they're still complaining about this and that...

but anyways, i really dont go out of my way to try to make myself look pretty.. like i dont wear make up and all that... altho i admit, i could lose a little bit of weight tho...
i think that a lot of guys like me would rather have a decent girl that's cute. Ithink knockouts are trouble. They are the ones everyone tries to pick up. I know you shouldn't be insecure but it's hard to ignore that guys are alwzays trying ot pick her up.

I don't mind when i'm w/ her. I'm the one that's going home w/ her. I kind of find it flattering but i want ot be there to protect her from creeps.

But all in all, it's good to be w/ a desirable girl w/ an attitude, then you know she can take care of herself.

And i agree w/ those that say that they prefer a girl w/ little meat. It's better than a bone wrack.

[kasia]

Originally posted by karizma@Oct 18 2002, 11:42 PM
>> id be having a conversation with girls about appearance and suddenly theyre calling themselves ugly. do i reassure them that they arent? nope. i dont say a damn thing. because the chick is either searching for 2 things a] she knows she's pretty and just wants a compliment or b] she really doesnt think she's pretty and needs reassurance....and ive realized that no matter how much i compliment the latter she'll never be satisfied because she herself think she's ugly and nothing i say will matter. so pfft why waste my breath.
when i sense that someone is fishing for compliments on their looks, i start talking about how pretty our mutual friend is or something. :) fishing for compliments = shameless

BUT, when i feel that they truly are insecure and could use a little encouragement, i usually won't mind telling them that they look great or that they're pretty, etc. for some people, a little can go a long way.

[angel nympho]

Originally posted by kasia@Oct 28 2002, 12:07 AM
Originally posted by karizma@Oct 18 2002, 11:42 PM
>> id be having a conversation with girls about appearance and suddenly theyre calling themselves ugly. do i reassure them that they arent? nope. i dont say a damn thing. because the chick is either searching for 2 things a] she knows she's pretty and just wants a compliment or b] she really doesnt think she's pretty and needs reassurance....and ive realized that no matter how much i compliment the latter she'll never be satisfied because she herself think she's ugly and nothing i say will matter. so pfft why waste my breath.
when i sense that someone is fishing for compliments on their looks, i start talking about how pretty our mutual friend is or something. :) fishing for compliments = shameless

BUT, when i feel that they truly are insecure and could use a little encouragement, i usually won't mind telling them that they look great or that they're pretty, etc. for some people, a little can go a long way.
I think people who straight say "I'M SO UGLY" are just fishing for compliments. If you really thought you were that booty-nasty, you'd probably try not to say anything like that for fear somebody will agree with you. And you'd probably not want to encourage people to look and examine you to tell you if you're right or not. If I thought I was butt ugly, I wouldn't EVER comment on it, hoping nobody would look at me. Like how fat people never seem to mention their fatness.

[Mr T]

Originally posted by ChairmanMah@Oct 19 2002, 01:20 AM
Originally posted by tapestrybabe@Oct 6 2002, 05:00 AM
you know what gets to me... the photos that i've seen of all you females... personally speaking, i think you're all beautiful looking.... yet, your still complaining about this and that...

and i'll confess... i dont think i'm that pretty looking compared to all the females here.... i mean, its not as if i turn a lot of guys heads or whateverz.... so, if you females are unsatisfied about this and that... than i feel, i must have a whole helluva lot to be unsatisifed about... dunno... i just find it weird.. that when i see a pretty face... that they're still complaining about this and that...

but anyways, i really dont go out of my way to try to make myself look pretty.. like i dont wear make up and all that... &nbsp;altho i admit, i could lose a little bit of weight tho...
i think that a lot of guys like me would rather have a decent girl that's cute. Ithink knockouts are trouble. They are the ones everyone tries to pick up. I know you shouldn't be insecure but it's hard to ignore that guys are alwzays trying ot pick her up.

I don't mind when i'm w/ her. I'm the one that's going home w/ her. I kind of find it flattering but i want ot be there to protect her from creeps.

But all in all, it's good to be w/ a desirable girl w/ an attitude, then you know she can take care of herself.

And i agree w/ those that say that they prefer a girl w/ little meat. It's better than a bone wrack.
Yeah, when you're in love with a beautiful woman... everybody wants her, everybody loves her.... [Dr. Hook]