interethnic dating

[kasia]

stigma dating people of certain ethnicities? how do you deal?



<!--EDIT|kasia|Aug 30 2002, 12:29 AM-->

[mrazntre]

i talk shit to my friends about it.


exactly how do we define "ethnicity" ??? any anthro majors/graduates in here?


because technically.... if i were to date a chinese girl, that would be interethnic. even if i were to date a vietnamese girl, and she wasn't from the same region as my parents were from, then that would also be interethnic right?

[kasia]

define it however you would like.

some taiwanese people would view dating cantonese as interethnic, etc. etc.

are all of you willing to date people of any ethnicity? or would a person of a certain ethnicity have to be "hella fine" or extraordinary for you to be willing to date him?

i'm not encouraging this sort of attitude, but i would like to create some discourse on this topic.

e.g., i have japanese friends who absolutely would not date filipinos. chinese and korean friends who would not date japanese. their attitudes are influenced by stereotypes as well as family.

[angel nympho]

I didn't really know that there was a stigma. I guess there kind of is. I deal with it the same way I deal with people who are upset by me dating white guys. Just shrug it off and say "at least I'm happy."

[thaite]

I'll date 'em as as long as I can find commonalities with her -- and I find her attractive. Race/ethnicity don't matter to me. I'd be an idiot if it did.



<!--EDIT|buoywonder|Sep 1 2002, 02:30 PM-->

[SunWuKong]

ethnicity - and race - doesn't matter to me.

but i'm strongly leaning towards chinese as far as marriage goes.

[mrazntre]

i agree with SWK.

I don't discriminate, but the matter of the fact is, when and if I do actually decide to get married and have kids I want my future kids to be Vietnamese. I want them to speak the language I do, I want them to be accustomed to customs that I know, and I want them to be oriented the same way that I was. Perhaps some people don't see it as a problem, but I really don't want to have to keep on explaining to my "significant other" what the hell my family is saying at family functions..

It'd just be easier.

[SunWuKong]

Originally posted by mrazntre@Sep 1 2002, 06:38 PM
i agree with SWK.

I don't discriminate, but the matter of the fact is, when and if I do actually decide to get married and have kids I want my future kids to be Vietnamese. I want them to speak the language I do, I want them to be accustomed to customs that I know, and I want them to be oriented the same way that I was. Perhaps some people don't see it as a problem, but I really don't want to have to keep on explaining to my "significant other" what the hell my family is saying at family functions..

It'd just be easier.
yup that's how i feel.

but there is an exception for me though, because in HK i've known white people (usually brits) who have grown up in HK and can speak fluent cantonese. they are probably more chinese than alot of ABCs. i would marry a white girl like that, especially if i were to raise my children in Asia.

[wylin]

as long as she can pee, shez good enuff for me.

alot of us face family pressures into marrying sumone of the same ethnicity. For example myself i have dated both mainland chinese and Taiwanese girls and my mom and dad seemed to take more interested when i dated taiwanese girls and expect somewhere deepdown i will marry a taiwanese girl. I myself say as long as its a good woman who can aide me in raising my children and is compatible its all good....as long as shez not more hairy than i am (personal pet peeve fuzzy ladies)

[Saiko]

Any race or ethnicity works for me. I choose by person rather than that other silly stuff. If anybody objects to that, that's their problem. I tend to be close to some of my male friends, and sometimes I hug them and stuff. Once in a long while I get dirty looks, but I wonder how many dirty looks I'd get if I were in a more Asian populated area.