Gaydar

[Sledge]

I tend to think less of people who swear by their "amazing gaydar" -- I see it as a socially acceptable form of stereotyping people. A friend of mine pointed out to me the other day that, stereotype though it may be, some gay men and women consciously align themselves with those very stereotypes as a matter of identity, making gaydar a valid tool for distinguishing gays. I'm not sure how to feel about that.

Any thoughts?

[rice cracker]

Shit, man, I need straightdar. I think every other guy I meet is gay. Then I find out I'm wrong.

I don't think it's so much gays aligning themselves with stereotypes, I mean, it doesn't take gaydar to spot a flamer, but more like subtle vibes one gets from interacting with a person.

[John0101]

I tend to think less of people who swear by their "amazing gaydar" -- I see it as a socially acceptable form of stereotyping people. A friend of mine pointed out to me the other day that, stereotype though it may be, some gay men and women consciously align themselves with those very stereotypes as a matter of identity, making gaydar a valid tool for distinguishing gays. I'm not sure how to feel about that.

Any thoughts?
I don't think it's true, I chilled with a gay cliche once and I could only tell one of them was gay, the other 3 I couldn't tell at all. But when I asked them about it they said they could spot a mile away that each other was gay. At the very least their gaydar was more intuned at the very least.

[myself808]

I tend to think less of people who swear by their "amazing gaydar" -- I see it as a socially acceptable form of stereotyping people. A friend of mine pointed out to me the other day that, stereotype though it may be, some gay men and women consciously align themselves with those very stereotypes as a matter of identity, making gaydar a valid tool for distinguishing gays. I'm not sure how to feel about that.your friend is close but its not so much a concious decision as much as what the person is. gaydar, however much a stereotyping behavior, is a sort of solidarity, i guess, a way of identifying *family*, for good or ill. it's similar, (but not the same) as how you can tell fob's and aba's apart

[kimpossible]

If I were forced to keep my sexuality and dating out of the mainstream, I'd have to rely on a more subversive method of picking out others like me too.

edit: I used to do the same thing with hapas. It wasn't so much subversive as it was... yeah, I have something in common with them but I don't *know* them and want to come off like a weirdo. Yet, I subconciously took note of them.

[SunWuKong]

Shit, man, I need straightdar. I think every other guy I meet is gay. Then I find out I'm wrong.

I don't think it's so much gays aligning themselves with stereotypes, I mean, it doesn't take gaydar to spot a flamer, but more like subtle vibes one gets from interacting with a person.

you know, i don't think i'd be able to tell that your friends are gay unless i was told.

[Green_Circle]

I know gay guys who swear they have gaydar when it comes to telling gays on screen or TV. So far a lot of what they said has come to pass.

[Sledge]

If I were forced to keep my sexuality and dating out of the mainstream, I'd have to rely on a more subversive method of picking out others like me too.

edit: I used to do the same thing with hapas. It wasn't so much subversive as it was... yeah, I have something in common with them but I don't *know* them and want to come off like a weirdo. Yet, I subconciously took note of them.

I couldn't agree more. People ask, "Why can't gays just act normal? Why do they need to segregate themselves from everyone else?" Well, who's really doing the segregating?

[lethal]

Playing it Straight (http://forums.yellowworld.org/showthread.php?t=14081) on Fox.

[sinisterpanda]

I agree totally. A little off topic but i was reading about this product once that was actually called a "gaydar". If you came within 10 feet (i made that up, but it's something around there) of another one it would beep or vibrate and then BAM.

[etcj]

I care less about men having gaydar than the fact that they're actually gay. Of course, that's unless they hope to become another mary to sit at the bar and scope out the guys..

[Fireblade]

there are hapas in hick country? hmm.

you know what would be interesting? go to san francisco and apply the "gaydar" there. you'd be surprised as to how wrong you can be.

love,
prof. frink

Damn Metrosexuals! :biggrin:

[Martino]

I agree totally. A little off topic but i was reading about this product once that was actually called a "gaydar". If you came within 10 feet (i made that up, but it's something around there) of another one it would beep or vibrate and then BAM.

BAM? What, you exploded?

"Gaydar" is just men getting, and holding, eye-contact in the street a fraction longer than heterosexuals. If you're lucky, you pick up the technique early (or regularly get beat up as a consequence).

Actually, getting rid of the roving eye is the tricky bit. Accidently picking up a strangers gay vibe when you're out on a date/with the BF is a guaranteed recipe for disaster.

[>:^|]

BAM? What, you exploded?

BAM, instant <3 :tongue:

I think that people who are familiar with a subculture can pick up on very subtle clues that might escape others. So it makes perfect sense to me that some people might more easily recognize that others are gay. In the same way, I often know when white-appearing people are part-Asian or when Asian-appearing people were raised by Whites.

But there aren't any definitive clues--gays are, like other people, an amazingly varied lot. Which seems like a really stupid thing to write. Like writing, "Asians are all individuals." :^P

[Martino]

BAM, instant <3 :tongue:

Oh, you mean BAM-BAM

I think that people who are familiar with a subculture can pick up on very subtle clues that might escape others.

Whatever happened to hanky codes? Were they ever real?

So it makes perfect sense to me that some people might more easily recognize that others are gay. In the same way, I often know when white-appearing people are part-Asian or when Asian-appearing people were raised by Whites.

But there aren't any definitive clues--gays are, like other people, an amazingly varied lot. Which seems like a really stupid thing to write. Like writing, "Asians are all individuals." :^P

Varied. Oh yes. It's those big 'uns with the walrus moustaches I watch out f--- no, never mind.

[>:^|]

Oh, you mean BAM-BAM

Whatever happened to hanky codes? Were they ever real?

No I meant loooove. That's why sinisterpanda has to be so careful. :wink:

Bandana codes were actually used in some parts of the U.S. for a while. Dunno about England.

[Faithless]

I wonder how good the pope's gaydar is, since he so good a making rules against 'em.