Hapa dating

[BeTheReds]

With the changing dating climate and the views and taboos people have I wonder what the perception on hapa dating is. Is it generally thought that we stick to other hapas, or do we see more hapas dating non-Asians? Or is it that hapas date Asians primarily? We all know that there is no trend for hapas as a group to generally do anything a certain way, but regardless certain perceptions of us as a group exist. So what is the common belief or stereotype in the case of hapa dating? Non-hapas should vote too.

Lastly, why do you think that hapas are perceived to be dating according to the above trend?

[BeTheReds]

Basically I voted based on my own perceptions. These might be skewed because I live in Japan, but I certainly see more Asian/hapa couples than anything else.

[BeTheReds]

BORING!

love,
Prof. Frink


Beat you to it!

[rice cracker]

I voted for another hapa, but that's assuming that their is an opportunity to date other hapas.

[coagulated fat]

I voted another hapa. My boyfriend's hapa. Julie should post her hapa fetishism article here.

[Napoleon Chynamite]

Basically I voted based on my own perceptions. These might be skewed because I live in Japan, but I certainly see more Asian/hapa couples than anything else.

Well yeah since hapas and non-Asians/non-Japanese are hecka outnumbered by Japanese.

[BeTheReds]

Well yeah since hapas and non-Asians/non-Japanese are hecka outnumbered by Japanese.


True, but do you think then it is more likely for hapas to date whites in America because they are outnumbered (tho likely not by so much)

[thaite]

No, not in my experience. That whole hapa fetishism thing hasn't reached these parts. If it were, I'd be hittin' it left and right.

I see hapas treat each other with the same kind of leeriness and suspicion that BTR sees -- too much one-upping each other to and not enough numbers to date each other.

That's not to say I wouldn't date another hapa, matter of fact, I find it preferable, but like I said, there's not enough of a pool here to draw from.

[SunWuKong]

maybe things are different on the west coast, but most of the hapas that i've known in real life don't know much about their Asian side and often just kind of ignore it. so i voted non-Asian.

[Chris]

in sf. I see more hapa dating asian now.

[SynRG]

In reality it totally depends on the person... even among hapas there are total different "types" of hapas... ones that are more "Asianized".. ones that are not.. one's that are hapa pride and even ones that hate other hapas, etc. All these different kinds of people will have different tastes when it comes to a partner.

I chose "another hapa" since my current girlfriend and my last girlfriend were both Eurasian. I found i clicked with them better and moreover clicked with their families very well. I know though alot of Eurasians that have siblings and have not been around alot of other hapas though feel wierd 'cuz when they see another Eurasian they like, think of their brother or sister or something.. i don't get that though 'cuz i'm an only child.. hehe.

As far as perception goes.. i really have no clue. I know lots of Eurasians and it's pretty even accross the board whether they are dating white or Asian. I think the environment has a whole lot to do with it.

[John0101]

I don't think one person can speak for another person and just because a hapa dates a non-asian doesn't mean they all will date an non-asian. Instead it solely depends on the person.

[rice cracker]

I don't think one person can speak for another person and just because a hapa dates a non-asian doesn't mean they all will date an non-asian. Instead it solely depends on the person.

I agree that it is up to the individual, however this thread is not arguing the reality of dating, but the perception of hapas and IR. I find it interesting what people are voting and their reasons for doing so, and hopefully by the time this thread has run its course I will have a better understanding about this hapa stereotype.

[AngryABCGirl]

I think it depends on the person and how strongly they idenify with their Asian side, most Hapas I've known go Asian.

[tapestrybabe]

i voted asian...
but again, it depends how
strongly they identify themselves...
but than again, i shouldnt really answer...
cuz i have no idea...

i just know...
if i had the choice...
i think i'd be open to dating a korean
whose mixed race...
but that depends how
strongly they identify being korean tho...

[Chad]

Given the chance, I would date another hapa. There's just not many around me. Mostly I see hapas dating non-Asians here, even the guys. Though overall sightings are rare.

[LaiSteve66]

My observation has been this. Asianized "hapas" date Asians and Whitewashed "hapas" date Whites. I have yet to see two "hapas" date.

[kimpossible]

I have yet to see two "hapas" date.

I think it would be more common on the West Coast than other parts of the US. I knew of a couple of hapa couples in the Seattle area. As for hapas dating Asians. Haven't seen too many or maybe I just haven't paid attention if I've seen them. I know I'm the only one of my mixed family (we have a couple of generations of mixed kids) to have married Asian. But quite frankly, I don't think anyone was going out of their way to fixate on race when they dated or married. It was more a matter of where they lived and who they met.

[tapestrybabe]

i once met a korean hapa...
i met him in korea during the
korean adoptee conference i attended...
he had been directing ppl where to go...
and in my head i was wondering...
who the hell is he, cuz he sure hell
didnt look asian/korean to me...
feeling like he didnt belong at the conference
to begin with... but shortly afterwards...
is when i learned he was one of us...
an adoptee, who had happened to
be a mixed race korean tho...

anyways, he's currently dating
another korean female...

[contra_diction]

i once met a korean hapa...
i met him in korea during the
korean adoptee conference i attended...
he had been directing ppl where to go...
and in my head i was wondering...
who the hell is he, cuz he sure hell
didnt look asian/korean to me...
feeling like he didnt belong at the conference
to begin with... but shortly afterwards...
is when i learned he was one of us...
an adoptee, who had happened to
be a mixed race korean tho...

anyways, he's currently dating
another korean female...

You know, I've always wondered about how out of place Koreans perceive me in Korea? I'm adopted (more or less) Korean hapa, and when I'm hanging out with Korean people (in Korea or the states), I usually feel pretty self-conscious as to how Korean I look. Sometimes, I'll even ask silly questions to a close friend like, "Do I look more Korean or more white today?"

Anyways, I voted non-Asian based on the majority of my individual observations and conversations I've had about other people's perceptions, even though I personally am with an Asian girl. I think hapa-hapa relationships are rare, if only because I find most hapas tend to identify with one side more than the other, but they aren't unheard of.

[rice cracker]

I think hapa+hapa is rare only because hapas make up so little of the overall population. In Minnesota, I didn't meet another half Asian until I moved to Minneapolis. And even then, it was just the one.

[Hapa Guru]

Given the chance, I would date another hapa. There's just not many around me. Mostly I see hapas dating non-Asians here, even the guys. Though overall sightings are rare.

Move your hapa butt outta TexSHIT, esp. when Hawaii's real estate market plumetts. This place is the bomb and there's hapas up the ying yang! Take it from a pro like moi who has surveyed hapa populations all over Texas, Hawaii, Oregon, Washington, New Mexico, Florida, and MaLAY"me"zia. Dude Honolulu has hapas off the hook! I saw like 3-4 just going to Wallmart an hour ago. Saw like 25-30 last night from the 3 clubs I went to and a restaurant I ate at. Unfreaking real, UNFREAKING REAL!!!!!!!!!!!:eek: :eek: :eek:

.......... and I have CRIED for YEARSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS in Texas so take it from ME!!!!!!!!!!!

I'll be in The Crying Man, part 2

[kimpossible]

Say, didn't I ban you once or twice before?

[rice cracker]

I want to date kimpossible, but she's taken.

[Hapa Guru]

Just from catching the bus around town + 1 hr at Ala Moana Shopping Center I saw 10-15 hapas. Dating hapas here shouldn't be a problem! I just need to lose about 20 lbs in the meantime. Been doing a lot of walking. It's just crazy how many hapas there are in Honolulu.

[kimpossible]

You were Hapameister, right?

[LaiSteve66]

You were Hapameister, right?

Yes that is hapameistser from hapas.com.

[kimpossible]

I mean Hapa Meister, banned mofo from YW. With a new account. :biggrin:

[Hapa Guru]

Does every banned person have "banned mofo" under their name or was it just Hapa Meister that got called "banned mofo"?:frown:

[LaiSteve66]

Does every banned person have "banned mofo" under their name or was it just Hapa Meister that got called "banned mofo"?:frown:

Every banned person earns the title "banned mofo", though I've seen some with the title "permanently banned".

[Hapa Guru]

Chad needs to hurry up and move to Hawaii, otherwise he ain't gonna get no "hapa play".:frown:

[Deadpool]

Chad can move here and get some "Deadpool play"
*licks Chad*

[Hapa Guru]

Deadpool, are you a homo hapa? I've seen about half a dozen homo hapas thus far, esp. at that homo club- VENUS- at the Ala Moana Shopping Center.

[Deadpool]

A/S/L, Hapa Guru, A/S/L?
S= male hopefully <3

[Chad]

you know something I was just thinking yesterday which might be a clue as to why all my attempts at serious relationships have been failures. it's impossible to avoid racial politics in them. maybe this is true for some non-mixed people as well. but i noticed that every time there are these questions of loyalty or "which side do u favor?"
an Asian woman has to deal with the pressure of being involved with a racially ambiguous man (not Chinese, not white, not good). the same for almost any other woman.
if I were 100% Chinese I think I could get away from this by dating Chinese women.. she would not have to feel uncomfortable about my race.
if I were a white man I could draw from the largest pool by dating white women and this would never be an issue.
but since neither of these are the case, it is always an issue and I don't see that changing.

[Craig]

you know something I was just thinking yesterday which might be a clue as to why all my attempts at serious relationships have been failures. it's impossible to avoid racial politics in them. maybe this is true for some non-mixed people as well. but i noticed that every time there are these questions of loyalty or "which side do u favor?"
an Asian woman has to deal with the pressure of being involved with a racially ambiguous man (not Chinese, not white, not good). the same for almost any other woman.
if I were 100% Chinese I think I could get away from this by dating Chinese women.. she would not have to feel uncomfortable about my race.
if I were a white man I could draw from the largest pool by dating white women and this would never be an issue.
but since neither of these are the case, it is always an issue and I don't see that changing.
In your case, I think the lack of a car is definitely not going to help matters.

Note, the following is speculation on my part, but ...
[a] I think there might be Asian American women who might not date white guys (because of the dislike of white privilege ... or wanting a connection to the Asian American experience) that might be willing to date a Eurasian guy.
[b] Also, I think they are Asian women who are whitewashed (and believe white men are unilaterally better looking) but would be willing to date a Eurasian guy so they could be an Asian connection to please the relatives or deal with issues like the Asian female's liking of Asian cuisine, etc.

[Chad]

well I agree that having a car could help in this department but it's a compromise i'm not willing to make. I've had a better life since i got rid of the car and i meet a lot more women when I'm walking as opposed to driving. even so, I could get a car and still walk everywhere. I've got a little money saved up for something cheap but I don't think it will happen.

it doesn't seem like an immediate need for me to be in anything serious right now but i've been giving it more thought lately. i go out with girls once in a while but it's always kind of a joke or a non-serious thing. it's fine for now but i don't want it to be this way forever.

[Hapa Guru]

LEAVE TexASS. Come to HAWAII!!!:biggrin:

[Hapa Guru]

Lots of White, Asian, and Hapa women will love you here. Heck, I've even seen a few Asian FOB dudes (and I just said FOB!) w/ fairly hot Black girls here in Honolulu. Now isn't that the rarest combination but I've seen 2-3 of these in just 2 weeks. One of them was at least a couple of which the guy was a big time FOBer.:eek:

Texas is just RACIST, get outta THERE!

[najjia]

its weird cuz my current bf of 2 yrs is white. but ive had boyfriends that were korean, chinese, indian, vietnamese, filipino, and pakistani. and i also dated a japanese hapa guy.

my current bf is the only guy that understands me well enough to put up with my BS. the other guys, well it depends. both the korean & chinese guys were american born & raised & the vietnamese, filipino, indian, and pakistani dudes were all FOBS. the hapa guy was way too agressive.

the only perfect fit was the white dude.

now i have nothing against fobs but theres this fob mentality that bugs me, especially with asian fob dudes. too much testosterone & too domineering. i'm a sadistic control freak myself & i just cant hang with men that power trip on me.

[Fireblade]

its weird cuz my current bf of 2 yrs is white. but ive had boyfriends that were korean, chinese, indian, vietnamese, filipino, and pakistani. and i also dated a japanese hapa guy.

my current bf is the only guy that understands me well enough to put up with my BS. the other guys, well it depends. both the korean & chinese guys were american born & raised & the vietnamese, filipino, indian, and pakistani dudes were all FOBS. the hapa guy was way too agressive.

the only perfect fit was the white dude.

now i have nothing against fobs but theres this fob mentality that bugs me, especially with asian fob dudes. too much testosterone & too domineering. i'm a sadistic control freak myself & i just cant hang with men that power trip on me.

You sure it wasn't just the guys you were dating? Generalizing anything can be bad. I've heard many times that "insert sterotype" of "enter race/group/ethnicity" men. Consequently, sometimes you have to ask yourself why you're drawn to particular men in the first place.

For example: this girl I know had the same problem you did, that being that supposedly asian guys were too chauvinist in the relationship. With that being said, I asked her if she ever thought that my ass was dominate. (We did date. We're just friends now.) She said no. But she claimed that I was different, simply because I wasn't like them.

So she kinda looked over what sort of entails most of her relationships, and examined what it was that attracted her to them. Turns out that they were all mostly jocks, or meatheads at the gym. And she accepted their offers of a date, and lasted long enough around them to reveal their asshole/jackass sides. Or they were raised by mothers who did everything for them. And hence expected her to do all the chores, cooking, etc.

So now she's dating some other guy who's pretty cool, and isn't anything like what she has dated before. I'm just giving an example here, and I try to illustrate that race usually has nothing to do with it. I'd be hard pressed to find what really is personality flaws, than something that is inherent in a particular group of men.

With that being said... I always attract crazy ass asian biotches. They scare me. :frown:

[najjia]

You sure it wasn't just the guys you were dating? Generalizing anything can be bad. I've heard many times that "insert sterotype" of "enter race/group/ethnicity" men. Consequently, sometimes you have to ask yourself why you're drawn to particular men in the first place.

For example: this girl I know had the same problem you did, that being that supposedly asian guys were too chauvinist in the relationship. With that being said, I asked her if she ever thought that my ass was dominate. (We did date. We're just friends now.) She said no. But she claimed that I was different, simply because I wasn't like them.

So she kinda looked over what sort of entails most of her relationships, and examined what it was that attracted her to them. Turns out that they were all mostly jocks, or meatheads at the gym. And she accepted their offers of a date, and lasted long enough around them to reveal their asshole/jackass sides. Or they were raised by mothers who did everything for them. And hence expected her to do all the chores, cooking, etc.

So now she's dating some other guy who's pretty cool, and isn't anything like what she has dated before. I'm just giving an example here, and I try to illustrate that race usually has nothing to do with it. I'd be hard pressed to find what really is personality flaws, than something that is inherent in a particular group of men.

With that being said... I always attract crazy ass asian biotches. They scare me. :frown:yes, ur right. race has nothing to do with it. i guess its just a personality thing. i think its coz i got really emotionally hurt when i broke up wid my korean ex. after him i dated different kinds of asian guys but i was always afraid of gettin hurt.

but honestly, the stereotype of the asian american male 'playa' totally exists. the same could be said about men of other races but since most of the guys i date are asian, then naturally... i kinda project that stereotype on them.

and i feel u on dating crazy ass asian biotches. for the most part we are crazy. but i miss all the drama tho.

i still cant get use to a man who dont eat rice 3 times a day. lolz!

[Hapa Guru]

its weird cuz my current bf of 2 yrs is white. but ive had boyfriends that were korean, chinese, indian, vietnamese, filipino, and pakistani. and i also dated a japanese hapa guy.

my current bf is the only guy that understands me well enough to put up with my BS. the other guys, well it depends. both the korean & chinese guys were american born & raised & the vietnamese, filipino, indian, and pakistani dudes were all FOBS. the hapa guy was way too agressive.

the only perfect fit was the white dude.

now i have nothing against fobs but theres this fob mentality that bugs me, especially with asian fob dudes. too much testosterone & too domineering. i'm a sadistic control freak myself & i just cant hang with men that power trip on me.

What do you mean by the hapa guy being "too aggressive"?
How did you meet him and what city/state do y'all live in?

[Animaeish]

I rarely meet Hapa women, no matter how they look, who don't identify more with and exclusively date Whites... even when I was in Hawaii. They often seemd to have an arrogance about it. But I noticed the same thing with many Hapa men who are phenotypically White.

I guess some people will ditch their friends in line if they are handed a VIP pass.

[Hapa Guru]

You take that good job in Cali w/ ur mom?

[Meancoldglare]

I pick Asian, the other's don't understand me.

[BeTheReds]

I pick Asian, the other's don't understand me.


The question was hapas in general, not your preference.

But whatever.

[Meancoldglare]

Well to validate my awnser, I see more hapas with asians....so.....yeah.....

LOL sorry

[Anaestacia]

I've dated more mixed people than non-mixed. It just happened that way.

[BeTheReds]

I've dated more mixed people than non-mixed. It just happened that way.


This thread does not ask about you yourself. It asks your belief of what most hapas would tend to do.

[Anaestacia]

Most mixed people I know date other mixed people. Are you happy? I voted according to the question. I shared MY experiences in my post.

[BeTheReds]

Actually no, I didn't want to know what most of your hapa friends do, I wanted to know what you believe the average hapa would do.

[Marzbarz]

I believe females Hapas would date White while male Hapas would date Asian.

[Powerful T]

I'm willing to bet I'm the least Asiaphiliac Hapa out there, but then again I'm classified as a freak by most ordinary people.

[Anaestacia]

I believe females Hapas would date White while male Hapas would date Asian.

From what angle?

And where and what are you basing this on? Out of curiosity. I find the white male least attractive.

Though they do have good hair follicles.

[returntosender]

From what angle?

And where and what are you basing this on? Out of curiosity. I find the white male least attractive.

Though they do have good hair follicles.

i could find you a poll voted by hapas on who they tend to date.

[Anaestacia]

i could find you a poll voted by hapas on who they tend to date.

Sure.

Though polls say very little in the larger picture. What was the demographics of the polled population like? Mixed people are spread out internationally and depending on their environment may veer off any "predicted outcome".

If someone were to say most AA women date more white than asian males, it would be controversy enough to tear the house down. It strikes me as just as ridiculous to offer the same oneliner without any background info.

[returntosender]

Sure.

Though polls say very little in the larger picture. What was the demographics of the polled population like? Mixed people are spread out internationally and depending on their environment may veer off any "predicted outcome".

If someone were to say most AA women date more white than asian males, it would be controversy enough to tear the house down. It strikes me as just as ridiculous to offer the same oneliner without any background info.

If you think your answer to this thread has any value, then I would give the poll and the respected responses in the other poll the same value. Likewise, if your answer is rubbish-then so is the other poll. If you think the poll is skewered by geography, then your response and experience is also skewered by geography. That isn't to say that there isn't a correct answer in all this. But again, if it has been your experience that hapas tend to date other hapas and you think that that is mostly true, then I can provide for you a counter-opinion of at least 30 or 40 other hapas that say otherwise.

Although you're right in saying that demographics are different, for the most part they are of the same environment-that is, they are english speakers, have a uniform pop culture, and have a smiliar mindset.

EDIT: Marzbarz is wrong about one thing; Hapa males really tend to date and marry white females. But there is a significant amount of them who date and marry asian females as well.

If someone were to say most AA women date more white than asian males, it would be controversy enough to tear the house down. It strikes me as just as ridiculous to offer the same oneliner without any background info.

Apples and oranges. I can't say for sure that I've been around a lot of hapa women, but I trust that the place I was lurking at paints a somewhat vivid picture of what hapas tend to be like-given the diverse location of all it's members, but most importantly, as a collective, they are very intelligent, socially aware, and well spoken individuals. Nevertheless, I get the vibe that they identified themselves more as 'caucasians' with a quasi-respect for multiculturalism. But since a lot of them do look caucasian, a statement like hapa women tend to date white men isn't the same thing as saying aa women tend to date white men. If you know what I mean.

[Seraphfire]

See my website in my sig (can't post URL) and look for US Statistics - Part-Asian.

If marriage is an indication of dating, then this is what I found from the Census statistics. Overseas couple tended to be more Hapa/Hapa combos while US-born favored Hapa/white.

Note: You probably notice the huge drop off in people who checked themselves as part-Asian from 2000 to the 2001-04 ACS. My guess is the survey questions were altered for the ACS. My guess is, in the 2000 Census, people who had just a small Asian background were included as Part-Asian and in the ACS, you had to have a bigger % Asian to be listed as Part-Asian.

[Deadpool]

I believe females Hapas would date White while male Hapas would date Asian.

Maybe it depends on location? Almost all hapa girls ive met or known are dating Chinese guys and vice versa.

[returntosender]

and how many is that?

[Deadpool]

and how many is that?

QUestion directed towards me? Gosh, around 10 that I know or know personally. The ones I see out in public are usually hanging around Asian crowds so I dunno if they are dating Asian doods.

[Napoleon Chynamite]

Yea, I don't claim to speak for anyone but from what I've seen there are plenty of hapas hanging around and dating Asian Americans all the time. That's why it's always been difficult for me to understand how some hapas say they have trouble fitting in with full-blooded Asians, but I'm sure it depends on the region and individual circumstances.

[Deadpool]

BTW I met a hapa girlie a few weeks ago. She had problems keeping her hands to herself. :D Toot toot. That was my own horn.
I hope people here don't read into this "#'s of who dates who and who won't date who" because it will seriously make you jaded and u will act differently towards a hapa girle or whomever. She will think you are desperate or weird and blow you off. Then that will justify your negative thinking even more.

[deerhoot]

i'm 1/2 korean it's tough to date a korean girl because i don't look korean enough to her parents. i can't even get into the korean bars in koreatown because i look japanese to koreans...wtf?

[BeTheReds]

i'm 1/2 korean it's tough to date a korean girl because i don't look korean enough to her parents. i can't even get into the korean bars in koreatown because i look japanese to koreans...wtf?


That isn't as odd as it sounds. In general the Japanese population is less homogenous as the Korean one is. I am not talking about recent outmarriage, but the fact that the Ainu (aka Jomon) used to inhabit most of Honshu before the continental people (aka Yayoi) migrated there and drove them back to the east then north so that their last bastion was Hokkaido. All the while exchanging culture, language and DNA with them. While we cant say that the Ainu look purely like White people, they in fact did appear to be different racially from the more common Asian continental stock such that the Japanese bloodline does exhibit some traits of such mixture (as well as others, such as polinesian traits) moreso than is present on the Korean peninsula.

In short, some Japanese even tho they are pure Japanese, look like they are mixed with White, even though it's not traceable.

If we want to use celebrity examples (which I hate) take a look at Hirai Ken. Perfect example of what we are talking about. Anyway...

[LaiSteve66]

http://www.sonymusic.co.jp/Music/Info/KenHirai/image/top_photo.jpg

He's full Japanese?

[BeTheReds]

Yes he is.

[capacitor276]

Growing up 1/2 German and 1/2 Chinese and looking more white than Asian, my problems with interracial dating have mostly (although not exclusively) came from Asian guys who assume that I am "whitewashed" before they even get to know me. I sense animosity from some Asian guys I've met because they think that I'm the stereotypical hapa pretending to be fully one culture.

[BeTheReds]

Growing up 1/2 German and 1/2 Chinese and looking more white than Asian, my problems with interracial dating have mostly (although not exclusively) came from Asian guys who assume that I am "whitewashed" before they even get to know me. I sense animosity from some Asian guys I've met because they think that I'm the stereotypical hapa pretending to be fully one culture.

Pretending to be fully one culture isn't the stereotype. The stereotype is pretending to be from two when one is not. (As most hapas are monolingual Americans).

And to tell you the truth... they will complain that hapas don't acknowledge their Asian sides, then complain again when hapas do aknowledge their Asian sides because "hapas shouldn't have the right to claim that they are Asian".

Yea anyway that's enough of my rant for the day...

[friedfishribs]

Not to spit in your face Capacitor, but most hapas I know identify more strongly with their white heritage then their Asian heritage. Usually, there's also this sense that they use their Asian-side to be chic and exotic. This is only in my personal experience though.

That being said, most of the hapas I know date white.

[capacitor276]

Not to spit in your face Capacitor, but most hapas I know identify more strongly with their white heritage then their Asian heritage. Usually, there's also this sense that they use their Asian-side to be chic and exotic. This is only in my personal experience though.

That being said, most of the hapas I know date white.

I can certainly see some hapas I know fitting that description. They tend to be the ones with very little encouragement from home to stay with both of their cultures, and who experience a lot of pressure to assimilate perhaps because of where they live (like all-white neighbourhoods).

But in my experience there are just as many hapas (if not more) who make an effort to know about both their parent's heritage. The difference I've seen with these people is that neither side of their family completely rejected them for not being 100% one ethnicity.

[BeTheReds]

capacitor, I must ask, what is your stake in Asian-America?

[capacitor276]

capacitor, I must ask, what is your stake in Asian-America?

What do you mean by stake? You mean whether I am hapa or not? Or whether I associate more with my Asian side or my European side?

[americanbeauty]

I date all men, but my latest phase has been black men.

[renfro]

I date all men, but my latest phase has been black men.

Phase? But I thought once you go black...

;-)

[bajinay]

friends of mine who are also mixed say that they wouldn't date another mixed person if they were the same racial mix. their reasoning was that there are so few people like them that doing so was sort of like dating your sister or brother. i guess because they would share similar features that might make them stick out even more among other monoraces. i just date whoever i want based on their personalities. but you know, i don't think i would date a white guy or a black guy (i'm half black half filipino) i couldn't date a white guy b/c i couldn't relate at all and i often find that black men idolize blasian women which sort of freaks me out....a lot....

[bmwhype]

friends of mine who are also mixed say that they wouldn't date another mixed person if they were the same racial mix. their reasoning was that there are so few people like them that doing so was sort of like dating your sister or brother. i guess because they would share similar features that might make them stick out even more among other monoraces. i just date whoever i want based on their personalities. but you know, i don't think i would date a white guy or a black guy (i'm half black half filipino) i couldn't date a white guy b/c i couldn't relate at all and i often find that black men idolize blasian women which sort of freaks me out....a lot....
lol

[thaite]

friends of mine who are also mixed say that they wouldn't date another mixed person if they were the same racial mix. their reasoning was that there are so few people like them that doing so was sort of like dating your sister or brother. i guess because they would share similar features that might make them stick out even more among other monoraces. i just date whoever i want based on their personalities. but you know, i don't think i would date a white guy or a black guy (i'm half black half filipino) i couldn't date a white guy b/c i couldn't relate at all and i often find that black men idolize blasian women which sort of freaks me out....a lot....

That's retarded. Do white people not date other white people because it's like dating a relative? Do black people?

Your friends have issues.

[bajinay]

That's retarded. Do white people not date other white people because it's like dating a relative? Do black people?

Your friends have issues.

it's more like a joke. but i hang around a lot of people who are of the same racial mix as me and we are always asked wherever we go if we're siblings or twins or whatever. i don' think this happens as much with all white people or all black people b/c of the greater diversity among them b/c there are more.

[Hapa Guru]

From what angle?

And where and what are you basing this on? Out of curiosity. I find the white male least attractive.

Though they do have good hair follicles.

How is it white males have good hair follicles? It seems Japanese & Koreans are amongst the least prone to male pattern baldness.

[Hapa Guru]

That isn't as odd as it sounds. In general the Japanese population is less homogenous as the Korean one is. I am not talking about recent outmarriage, but the fact that the Ainu (aka Jomon) used to inhabit most of Honshu before the continental people (aka Yayoi) migrated there and drove them back to the east then north so that their last bastion was Hokkaido. All the while exchanging culture, language and DNA with them. While we cant say that the Ainu look purely like White people, they in fact did appear to be different racially from the more common Asian continental stock such that the Japanese bloodline does exhibit some traits of such mixture (as well as others, such as polinesian traits) moreso than is present on the Korean peninsula.

In short, some Japanese even tho they are pure Japanese, look like they are mixed with White, even though it's not traceable.

If we want to use celebrity examples (which I hate) take a look at Hirai Ken. Perfect example of what we are talking about. Anyway...


Yep, lately I"ve seen a few Japanese in Honolulu that look a little mixed with Caucasian. One could almost pass for a more Asian-looking hapa gal. Haven't seen any Chinese or Korean girls that look this mixed though and the "little mixed look" is quite rare as well vs. the Japanese population. Gotta be an Ainu thing!

[Hapa Guru]

I see about 3-5 times more hapas around downtown Honolulu and certain Colleges here than 5+ yrs ago. It's astounding! Due to this drastic increase in hapa peeps and IR couples I'm also tending to see a lot more scrubber hapas than I did in the past. The unfortunate rejects that look up to we more attractive original hapaz.

The Hawaiian hapa mixes tend to date other Hawaiian hapa mixes quite often.

Asian hapa females seem to date whites around 30% of the time, other hapas 30% of the time (75% of the time another Asian hapa, 25% of the time a Hawaiian hapa mix), Asians (rarely Asian+Asian mix) 30% of the time, and OTHER 10% of the time (eg. 2 black guys and a sorta Indian/Middle Eastern-looking guy).

Asian hapa males tend to date Asian girls (or Asian+Asian mix) 50% of the time, Hapa girls 25% of the time, White girls 10% of the time, and OTHER 15% of the time.

[YelloFello]

Statistically speaking and as a whole, I think hapa men are more likely to date Asian women or other hapas, whereas hapa women are more likely to date white men or another hapas, particularly in cities that have a cultural mix of people.

[KenTsui]

i am this and that..

please date me here and now!

how and why?

[bajinay]

It depends on where you grew up. People who grew up in a more a diverse environment maybe among a lot of other multiracial people may not even really question who they date and find it easy to move between hapas and non-hapas while those who grew up outside such an environment would most likely find it strange to date someone who is also hapa. It depends on how comfortable they are with their identity. If they are still struggling with whether they want to be identified as being hapa at all and want to be classified as being mono-racial, then they will most likely date someone within the group they identify more with. Those who are most comfortable and proud of their hapa identity will date other hapas or monoracials. This was one of the questions posed in my research paper i'm working on right now.