disrespect towards overweight people.

[applehead]

here ya go.
dish it out here hapakristina.

[hooligan]

here ya go.
dish it out here hapakristina.
link to original thread?

[AliBabaIncorporated]

dish out disrespect to overweight people?

[kitty]

fat people have feelings too!!

[applehead]

dish out disrespect to overweight people?

no silly!!!
here.
http://forums.yellowworld.org/showpost.php?p=194655&postcount=55

[hapakristina]

haha.. dude, a thread didn't need to be created about this. :tongue:

[ChinaLama]

http://img.villagephotos.com/p/2003-12/528432/buddyicon.gif

[applehead]

chubby babies are cute.

[ChinaLama]

chubby babies are cute.

and tasty.

[applehead]

i bite cute babies.
*bite.*

okiee. what. hapakristina.
i made this thread for you.
i think you had lots of valid points.
=)

[AliBabaIncorporated]

i think you had lots of valid points
and yet you open the thread with subtle yet slighting food references such as "dish it out." :tongue:

[hapakristina]

haha.. i dunno, i normally just don't outright and make topics about things. i guess for myself, my weight is an extremely sensitive subject. it's been the object of my ridicule and pain for almost all my life, but especially hard in college as i managed to put on a considerable amount of weight. god, i'm such a baby.. just even thinking about it makes me cry! *wipes eyes*..

i hate it. i wish i wasn't so sensitive to the topic. i guess the hardest was that my ex's mother actually made some very harsh comments about me. it wasn't enough for her that i made her son happy and had so much going for me. but she had to lecture him about how outer beauty was important in relationships and how i was so repulsive to look at. she made comments that he should help me lose weight. if i felt that she was concerned about my health, i could accept her comments better.. but it came after she lectured him about how physical beauty was extremely important and that he should be with someone that's attractive and looks good with him (he was 5'7" and as i've said, i'm nearing 6'). it just hit me at that point.. i totally lost all self-esteem and ever since her biting remarks, being overweight and incidents of insensitivity towards overweight people just touches me because it hits me on a personal level to the max.

at least i'm trying to do something about it and not just sitting here unhappy with it, but i still have people make insensitive comments like, "if you're so unhappy, why not do something about it?".. it's like, "well, hello asshole!? i didn't put it on overnight and it's not going to come off overnight." anyhow, there's my stance on this matter in a nutshell.

[applehead]

and yet you open the thread with subtle yet slighting food references such as "dish it out." :tongue:


it wasn't intentional!!!

i hear you girl.
most people don't realize how hard
it is to lose weight.

[hooligan]

i work out a lot during the summer but i put on a lot of weight during the school year :( i just don't have time to work out :( boo

[kasia]

haha.. i dunno, i normally just don't outright and make topics about things. i guess for myself, my weight is an extremely sensitive subject. it's been the object of my ridicule and pain for almost all my life, but especially hard in college as i managed to put on a considerable amount of weight. god, i'm such a baby.. just even thinking about it makes me cry! *wipes eyes*..

i hate it. i wish i wasn't so sensitive to the topic. i guess the hardest was that my ex's mother actually made some very harsh comments about me. it wasn't enough for her that i made her son happy and had so much going for me. but she had to lecture him about how outer beauty was important in relationships and how i was so repulsive to look at. she made comments that he should help me lose weight. if i felt that she was concerned about my health, i could accept her comments better.. but it came after she lectured him about how physical beauty was extremely important and that he should be with someone that's attractive and looks good with him (he was 5'7" and as i've said, i'm nearing 6'). it just hit me at that point.. i totally lost all self-esteem and ever since her biting remarks, being overweight and incidents of insensitivity towards overweight people just touches me because it hits me on a personal level to the max.

at least i'm trying to do something about it and not just sitting here unhappy with it, but i still have people make insensitive comments like, "if you're so unhappy, why not do something about it?".. it's like, "well, hello asshole!? i didn't put it on overnight and it's not going to come off overnight." anyhow, there's my stance on this matter in a nutshell.

it's a senstive topic. just makes me wonder if a guy would have had to go through the same thing with his gf's parents if he were overweight. i.e., i think that girls are judged more harshly on their weight.

like i said in the other thread, it's how you feel about yourself that is important. i can understand if they're concerned for your health - that is, if you were extremely overweight. however, that doesn't seem to be the case. be thankful that she's your ex's mother and not your current bf's mother - at least you won't have to deal with her anymore. kinda disgusts me how women - instead of educating younger girls about having a positive self-image - would instead make them feel bad about NOT being anorexic.

[hapakristina]

it's a senstive topic. just makes me wonder if a guy would have had to go through the same thing with his gf's parents if he were overweight. i.e., i think that girls are judged more harshly on their weight.

most definitely! i completely agree with you.



like i said in the other thread, it's how you feel about yourself that is important. i can understand if they're concerned for your health - that is, if you were extremely overweight. however, that doesn't seem to be the case.

thanks for the compliment, but i think 1) i hold my weight well and 2) you're only getting a portion of my picture in my avatar. i'm actually considered obese by what obese standards are. :frown: kinda sad, but it's also one of the reasons i'm seeking to get back into shape.


be thankful that she's your ex's mother and not your current bf's mother - at least you won't have to deal with her anymore. kinda disgusts me how women - instead of educating younger girls about having a positive self-image - would instead make them feel bad about NOT being anorexic.

that's exactly how i felt. how could a woman be so cruel and insensitive to such a subject. and girl.. you have nooooooooo idea how happy i don't have to deal with my ex's mom! :tongue:

[missmeow]

haha.. i dunno, i normally just don't outright and make topics about things. i guess for myself, my weight is an extremely sensitive subject. it's been the object of my ridicule and pain for almost all my life, but especially hard in college as i managed to put on a considerable amount of weight. god, i'm such a baby.. just even thinking about it makes me cry! *wipes eyes*..

You look skinny in your avatar. And hot too.



i hate it. i wish i wasn't so sensitive to the topic. i guess the hardest was that my ex's mother actually made some very harsh comments about me. it wasn't enough for her that i made her son happy and had so much going for me. but she had to lecture him about how outer beauty was important in relationships and how i was so repulsive to look at.

It sounds more like she has issues with letting her son go, so she transfers them on to you. A lot of moms have weird attachments to their sons and will do anything to make sure that their sons never leave their side (or get out of their control). She sounds like an awful woman. I would not take to heart what she said to you. Chances are she's chased other women away as well.

at least i'm trying to do something about it and not just sitting here unhappy with it, but i still have people make insensitive comments like, "if you're so unhappy, why not do something about it?".. it's like, "well, hello asshole!? i didn't put it on overnight and it's not going to come off overnight." anyhow, there's my stance on this matter in a nutshell.

I agree with you here. I think the worst thing someone can tell an overweight person is "put the fork down". Sometimes there are physical reasons why a person is overweight. But even if there aren't, being overweight has definate pyschological factors. It isn't so easy to put down the fork when you feel like you don't deserve to put down the fork (ie you don't deserve to be thin, happy, etc.). I wish people would be more sensitive to others. People who would never think to make a racist comment have no problem with ripping on a fat person.

[hapakristina]

You look skinny in your avatar. And hot too.

:eek: haha.. thanks girl! i appreciate it. skinny, i am not. but i think facially, i'm a decent looking person. hmmmmm.. here's a picture of me in HS, during my JR year. this was me at my lightest. i was 5'10" here and 180.

http://i.xanga.com/hapakimiko/bball01.jpg

mind you.. this was back in 1997, so about 6 years ago or so. i've grown almost 2" and have put on a lot more weight since then. i think my height and muscular mass have allowed for me to hold my weight well.



It sounds more like she has issues with letting her son go, so she transfers them on to you. A lot of moms have weird attachments to their sons and will do anything to make sure that their sons never leave their side (or get out of their control). She sounds like an awful woman. I would not take to heart what she said to you. Chances are she's chased other women away as well.

you know, i was his first GF. his second GF, right after me seemed to meet the standards she had wanted for him. she was younger though.. 18. but she was full korean, 5'2" or so, and extremely skinny. she could speak korean, which meant she could communicate with her.. i try and definitely not take to heart what she's said, but sometimes i wonder if she was one of the large reasons he and i broke up. anyhow, i'm happier without her in my life.. and he's happy now with his GF and she's happy with him and his GF.. so everything's better.

and i definitely agree with your last comments about weight being so much more than a "put the fork down and stop eating so much" matter. i mean, i gained weight not because i just sat there stuffing my face. there were a lot of factors. for one, i went from 6 days a week of basketball 2 hours a day.. to NOTHING. just school and working almost 30 hours a week as a freshman in college. it was a huge change. but add that kind of schedule, lack of physical activity, and starchy foods served at the school cafeteria.. explains a lot of my weight gain. i just can't believe i've let myself go so much.

[mr. x]

http://img.villagephotos.com/p/2003-12/528432/buddyicon.gif

omg where's that from? the KKK memorabilia website?

[BeTheReds]

I think it's the little rascals.

[ChinaLama]

omg where's that from? the KKK memorabilia website?

random internet thread w/ a title like "this pic scares me."

you just *had* to bring race into this huh. formerly it coulda just been a pic of a fat kid, but nope you had to emphasize he's a fat *Black* kid and make me feel guilty for laughing at it.

[mr. x]

kris dont sweat it i think its tough in college, i mean who has time to excercise. i know this girl, had (still kinda have) a huge crush on her. she was really athletic and when i saw her again after graduation i wouldnt say she gained a lot but i duno, she might have, MIGHTVE gained a lil i spose its just i always have this picture of her set in my mind. she played bball too. its nothing too noticeable just yeah, i wouldnt want her to let herself go too much either but im sure she knows how to balance herself so yeah

[mr. x]

random internet thread w/ a title like "this pic scares me."

you just *had* to bring race into this huh. formerly it coulda just been a pic of a fat kid, but nope you had to emphasize he's a fat *Black* kid and make me feel guilty for laughing at it.

definetely couldnt do that these days. i mean look at his eyes! might as well give him a GD watermelon for bob's sakes

[BeTheReds]

Many people who were athletes at some point in their lives gain a lot of weight after they stop being active.

[himura-dono]

and i definitely agree with your last comments about weight being so much more than a "put the fork down and stop eating so much" matter. i mean, i gained weight not because i just sat there stuffing my face. there were a lot of factors. for one, i went from 6 days a week of basketball 2 hours a day.. to NOTHING. just school and working almost 30 hours a week as a freshman in college. it was a huge change. but add that kind of schedule, lack of physical activity, and starchy foods served at the school cafeteria.. explains a lot of my weight gain. i just can't believe i've let myself go so much.

i can totally understand you =(. in high school i was 6' 185lbs and it was all muscle. i worked out all the time and biked and jogged all the time when i wasn't working or doing hw and had a rediculously low % of body fat (i think it was 2 or 3% if i remember right).

then when i got to school i didn't have time to work out, and actually had to study for once in my life, and learning to actually need sleep (i was and still sorta am an insomniac). eating at the dc was the biggest problem because it's buffet style and i had always been a huge eater because my body actually needed it back then, but since i had become inactive at school, my body wasn't burning through the calories like it used to. i quickly put on a LOT of weight. my arms, legs and butt stayed pretty muscular, but my stomach got to the point where it became a big gut. =(

i still carry a lot of the weight i gained back then and am trying to get rid of it now. i started controlling what i ate my sophomore and junior year and trimmed down a little, but only seemed to keep myself from blowing up any further. but i've been trying to slowly get back into running and putting wieght routines back together. i've always been averse to machines like tread mills and stair climbers, but i noticed some of my friends using cardio runners and trimming down dramatically while still controlling their diet. i'm thinking of giving it a go too, because i'd like to eventually get back into how i was in hs, where i didn't have any confidence issues in my appearance.

i think you deserve karma for what you had to say (and did give you some) because to me it struck a nerve i had been trying to ignore lately. thanks. =)

[missmeow]

:eek: haha.. thanks girl! i appreciate it. skinny, i am not. but i think facially, i'm a decent looking person. hmmmmm.. here's a picture of me in HS, during my JR year. this was me at my lightest. i was 5'10" here and 180.

http://i.xanga.com/hapakimiko/bball01.jpg

mind you.. this was back in 1997, so about 6 years ago or so. i've grown almost 2" and have put on a lot more weight since then. i think my height and muscular mass have allowed for me to hold my weight well.



Damn you are one cute amazon! (I'm no lesbian though!)

*le sigh*

You're so lucky and you don't even know it! (take it from a shrimp)

Honestly, at 6 feet tall and muscular, you're not going to weigh 125. That would be disgustingly skinny and unhealthy. Maybe supermodels do, but they also have eating disorders and are nothing but bones and skin. Muscle weighs more than fat, and someone who is muscular can weigh a lot more and still be healthy.






you know, i was his first GF.

[quote]

definate control issues!

[quote]his second GF, right after me seemed to meet the standards she had wanted for him. she was younger though.. 18. but she was full korean, 5'2" or so, and extremely skinny. she could speak korean, which meant she could communicate with her..


Bleh, sounds like she was intimidated by you!

i try and definitely not take to heart what she's said, but sometimes i wonder if she was one of the large reasons he and i broke up. anyhow, i'm happier without her in my life.. and he's happy now with his GF and she's happy with him and his GF.. so everything's better.


Oh, I would not doubt it. Parents can have a profound effect on their children's relationship. I still say she is a control freak nut!

and i definitely agree with your last comments about weight being so much more than a "put the fork down and stop eating so much" matter. i mean, i gained weight not because i just sat there stuffing my face. there were a lot of factors. for one, i went from 6 days a week of basketball 2 hours a day.. to NOTHING. just school and working almost 30 hours a week as a freshman in college. it was a huge change. but add that kind of schedule, lack of physical activity, and starchy foods served at the school cafeteria.. explains a lot of my weight gain. i just can't believe i've let myself go so much.

Add in depression, anxiety, and lack of confidence and you have a mix of factors that are just as powerful, if not more so, than any "physical" condition. What kills me is that people assume you "let yourself go". I don't think anyone sits down and say, "gee I think I'll gain 20/30/50/100 pounds". Something like depression can come around and knock a person on their butt and 6 months later, they're huge witout even realizing it. Once you put the weight on, it is very hard to take it off. I think that is why someone who has never had to battle their weight (outside of dropping maybe a tenner) can never understand how much effort it takes to lose weight.

[mr. x]

so what would u guys suggest eating in college? just pasta without the trimmings etc.?

[AliBabaIncorporated]

Many people who were athletes at some point in their lives gain a lot of weight after they stop being active.
hmm ... most of the people on my volleyball team turned into skinny little bastards after graduation, though (except the ones who got recruited for college volleyball). I think I'm the most extreme example, but others as well.

Sometimes I wonder why skinny guys in our society don't have more body issues like overweight girls do. After all, we're bombarded with images of muscular men or even just plain old heavyset men on the TV. But no one ever shows skinny guys. Hell, even all the computer hackers they arrest are heavy guys.

[hapakristina]

thanks, himura-dono. i'm glad that others here can relate and that i have been able to "speak up" for not only myself and how sensitive of a subject this is for me.. but how it's personal for many others. BTR is right on about HS athletes that hit college and without that continuation of physical training and working out.. their bodies end up suffering a very quick and fast weight gain. it's good that you recognize it though and are starting to take care of your body. better now and while you're still young and able to do it, before it gets harder and worse. i have to be careful too.. my dad's side of the family has a history of heart attacks and young premature death due to heart disease. so, the sooner i get control of my weight.. the better.

[missmeow]

so what would u guys suggest eating in college? just pasta without the trimmings etc.?

Ugh, no pasta unless it is whole wheat. No crap carbs!

[hapakristina]

Sometimes I wonder why skinny guys in our society don't have more body issues like overweight girls do. After all, we're bombarded with images of muscular men or even just plain old heavyset men on the TV. But no one ever shows skinny guys. Hell, even all the computer hackers they arrest are heavy guys.

because skinny is still considered better than overweight. even for guys. for women, i believe that it's strongly a media issue. the one thing that i'm happy that i can honestly say is that i don't measure myself against those models on the cover of magazines. i try being a bit realistic. many of those girls are several inches smaller than me and do not have nearly the bone size/mass as i do, nor the muscle mass. the only person that i compare myself to and hold up my own standard is myself and what i KNOW i'm capable of looking like. if i were to sit there and constantly wish i had a body like britney spears or jessica alba.. the fact of the matter is that i'd never be satisfied with my body and i'd probably drive myself to illness (eating disorder). that's the one healthy thing about my approach.. i refuse to lose weight using diet pills, drugs, surgery, or eating disorders. i want to lose this as healthy and natural as possible.

[ChinaLama]

so what would u guys suggest eating in college? just pasta without the trimmings etc.?

maybe lots of celery since raw celery burns more calories than it gives.

[hapakristina]

kris dont sweat it i think its tough in college, i mean who has time to excercise. i know this girl, had (still kinda have) a huge crush on her. she was really athletic and when i saw her again after graduation i wouldnt say she gained a lot but i duno, she might have, MIGHTVE gained a lil i spose its just i always have this picture of her set in my mind. she played bball too. its nothing too noticeable just yeah, i wouldnt want her to let herself go too much either but im sure she knows how to balance herself so yeah

thanks for your words, hun. i appreciate it. you know, it's sad.. but my goal is to have lost my college weight by my first HS reunion. means i have 5 years. i think i'm capable of it. i've started working out again and in 3 months managed to lose almost 10 lbs and 8" (total - waist, hips, bust, arms, thighs, and calves). i've stopped a bit this past month cause of school and being so damn busy.. this week FINALS! but i'll be back in the groove. i'm thinking of adding some cardio in with it as well. i really need to attack my diet though. i think that's where probably 80% of my problem now lies.

[BeTheReds]

hmm ... most of the people on my volleyball team turned into skinny little bastards after graduation, though (except the ones who got recruited for college volleyball). I think I'm the most extreme example, but others as well.

Sometimes I wonder why skinny guys in our society don't have more body issues like overweight girls do. After all, we're bombarded with images of muscular men or even just plain old heavyset men on the TV. But no one ever shows skinny guys. Hell, even all the computer hackers they arrest are heavy guys.

I played volleyball too, and actually lost weight after stopping, as with decreased activity, I became less hungry. But you also have to admit that Volleyball is not a very strenuous sport that requres a lot of stamina. Sure you sweat, and sure you feel tired a lot of the time, but basketball and soccer involves a lot more cardiovascular fitness since you have to always be running. In volleyball all the action comes in spurts, and you only need to exert yourself to spike, block, or dive for the ball. All other times you spend waiting or watching someone else play the ball. I think had you and I played soccer instead, we would have gained a lot more muscle and stamina in HS, and had a huge appetite to match. Then when we stopped playing, it would take our bodies longer to get to a "healthy" out of shape level.

[ChinaLama]

now i wonder. who would win in a fight? bess aka aznbuffgirl or HK? I mean you could both kick my ass but that's a meaningless statement since anyone can kick my ass.

[hapakristina]

now i wonder. who would win in a fight? bess aka aznbuffgirl or HK? I mean you could both kick my ass but that's a meaningless statement since anyone can kick my ass.

haha.. the last fight i got into was in 7th grade against this 8th grade guy. it wasn't a pretty fight. i'm not really a fighter, but i think my strength is enough to PROTECT myself. i think if ever presented in a situation of a fight.. i wouldn't fight back more so than contain the person trying to fight with me. i think my own strength shocks myself and even guys. :tongue:

[hapakristina]

I played volleyball too, and actually lost weight after stopping, as with decreased activity, I became less hungry. But you also have to admit that Volleyball is not a very strenuous sport that requres a lot of stamina. Sure you sweat, and sure you feel tired a lot of the time, but basketball and soccer involves a lot more cardiovascular fitness since you have to always be running. In volleyball all the action comes in spurts, and you only need to exert yourself to spike, block, or dive for the ball. All other times you spend waiting or watching someone else play the ball. I think had you and I played soccer instead, we would have gained a lot more muscle and stamina in HS, and had a huge appetite to match. Then when we stopped playing, it would take our bodies longer to get to a "healthy" out of shape level.

that's weird. for some reason, i always pictured you playing volleyball. dunno why. anyhow, i was approached to play volleyball in HS, but it just wasn't my sport. plus i really wanted to concentrate on volleyball. for me, i noticed that when bball season ended.. my problem was that i was EATING the same, but not working out and exercising the same.. hence, a very quick weight gain for me.

[teaz0r]

thanks for your words, hun. i appreciate it. you know, it's sad.. but my goal is to have lost my college weight by my first HS reunion. means i have 5 years. i think i'm capable of it. i've started working out again and in 3 months managed to lose almost 10 lbs and 8" (total - waist, hips, bust, arms, thighs, and calves). i've stopped a bit this past month cause of school and being so damn busy.. this week FINALS! but i'll be back in the groove. i'm thinking of adding some cardio in with it as well. i really need to attack my diet though. i think that's where probably 80% of my problem now lies.

as long as you lose the weight for yourself and
not in order to win some "most changed class
member" prize at the reunion. cliche' i nkow, the
whole doi t for yourself, but it's true. i've totally
struggled with my weight most of my life, i've done
everything stupid to try to lose it, and almost
everything smart.

like you, it's always been a sensitive subject for me,
and also like you, it all started from a boyfriend. i
thought i was always of average weight, healthy at
least, but i wasn't super toned. so the boyfriend
makes me eat protein power stuffmixes it into my food,
so that i /have/ to work out or else i get fat. and at
that time. being fat was just... out of the question.
i've done pills, shoved a finger down my throat, never
did starve though - couldn't give up food, gone to see
the nutritionist, bought gym memberships, bought diet
books, go see the doctor and insist that he sucks out
the fat on my arms.

i dunno. the whole boyfriend thing happened so long ago.
looking back i was pretty retarded. now, i just don't really
give a fuck. i do admit i'll bitch and moan about it even till
now, but... whatever dude, all i care about now is that i
don't go into heart failure from eating too much pork fat.
as long as my doctor says i'm healthy, i'm fine at whatever
weight.

[hapakristina]

as long as you lose the weight for yourself and
not in order to win some "most changed class
member" prize at the reunion. cliche' i nkow, the
whole doi t for yourself, but it's true. i've totally
struggled with my weight most of my life, i've done
everything stupid to try to lose it, and almost
everything smart.

i think now, i'm finally doing it for myself. for a while there, i actually almost DIDN'T want to lose the weight because i didn't want his mother getting the satisfaction. i know, seems kind of dumb. but then i realized something important too.. that my weight became somewhat of a security blanket for me. it was almost a means of finding guys that actually cared about me for ME. i guess one fear i have is that if i lose the weight, will people be hitting on me because they dig WHO I AM, or because they're attracted to the cover? at least now, sometimes i feel that when a guy expresses interest in me.. i feel it's for what i have to offer inside, not something he necessarily wants outside.

also, i don't think it STARTED with my ex. i think it was brought to light and escalatad while i was with him. my weight was always a struggle for me growing up. i was always a "big girl".. having developed early (being 5'7" and 130 as a 5th grader) to even being 2 years old and mistaken for 4 or 5 year old. my brother was always the tall lanky one between the two of us. even now, we both have the gut.. but he's got these chicken legs. i've always had really strong and muscular legs. he'd tease me all the time and call me fat. so a lot of my insecurity was there all throughout my childhood.. it didn't get worse until college and then when my ex's mother brought it to light.

thanks for sharing your story. i'm glad that you're doing things for yourself now. that's really the healthiest way to go about it and after hearing about my friend losing 40 lbs from working out and being where i was.. i was convinced that i was capable of doing the same. i still am. :smile:

[mr. x]

hk anyone actually make comments about your weight?

[hapakristina]

hk anyone actually make comments about your weight?

very much so. between my ex's mother (as mentioned). i got into a HUGE fight with my grandmother about some of her insensitive comments. on some of the boards i frequent, some of the members.. when they can no longer argue with me about the topic.. resort to some childish name calling or low blow towards my weight. i don't really get people that say shit to my face in person.. i think it's partly because 1) i'm really friendly and i tend to smile a lot.. kinda hard to be mean to a person that's smiling eh? and 2) i'm tall.. so i think that i either intimidate people or i hold my weight well.

i'll be honest with you guys, simply because i guess i'm not afraid to admit how much i've let myself go. but i'm about 5'11.5" or so and i weigh around 260. *ducks* :frown: ... yes, i am not bullshitting you guys. that means i've put on about 80 lbs since HS.

here's a couple more recent pictures.

http://i.xanga.com/hapakimiko/sr_portrait37.jpg http://i.xanga.com/hapakimiko/sackris10.JPG

http://i.xanga.com/hapakimiko/justin_kris02.jpg

obviously looking at these pictures, with my previous one from 6 years ago.. my face is a lot fuller and rounder. i'm losing my dimple! haha! :frown: priorities i suppose.. blech.

[himura-dono]

http://i.xanga.com/hapakimiko/justin_kris02.jpg

obviously looking at these pictures, with my previous one from 6 years ago.. my face is a lot fuller and rounder. i'm losing my dimple! haha! :frown: priorities i suppose.. blech.

rofl! your friend justin has "THE BROW~!"

sorry, joke between me and my friends about certain eyebrows.

i mean no offense in any way.

[Lingmui]

i think you're very pretty. don't let anyone bring you down. good luck with your weight loss! =)

[Emperor_Mike]

I agree, HK. If you let people erode at your self-confidence you're only letting them have the upper hand. They're certainly not better than you and I would argue that people like that aren't better than anyone at all because it's likely that they're resorting to such cruel measures to make themselves feel better. To echo Lingmui, good luck with your efforts! So long as you're happy with who you are, that's all that matters, yes?

[hapakristina]

rofl! your friend justin has "THE BROW~!"

sorry, joke between me and my friends about certain eyebrows.

i mean no offense in any way.

doooooooood... bwaahahahahhahahhahahah.. *cracking up* omfg! it's almost 4am and you have me rollin'. no worries. lol.. hahahahahaha.. it's my inside joke with my mom and friends about my friend. i was like, "hey mom.. going out with justin." and she just looked at me and said, "the eyebrow dude?" and i busted up laughin!

*sigh*

ahhhhh man. no offense taken. yes, i know all about poor justin's bert-syndrome. oh man. i'm so mean. :frown: :biggrin: :tongue:

[hapakristina]

lingmui and emperor mike.. thank you both for your encouraging words. i appreciate it. i really didn't mean to turn the whole dang thread into this "woe is me" thing or anything. but i really do appreciate everyone's encouraging words. it's been quite uplifting, to say the least.

[Emperor_Mike]

and tasty.

Just what is it with you and eating children?

[ellsworth81]

so what would u guys suggest eating in college? just pasta without the trimmings etc.?


eat a balanced diet. preferrably without too many carbs. so lots of green leafy veggies (i was told no iceberg lettuce) and lean meat (turkey, fish, chicken) and occasional caffeine here and there doesn't hurt.

avoid chicken nugget and pasta nite at the dorms. also avoid the alfredo sauce. not only is it typically loaded with fat (despite it's rich awesome taste), who knows what else they put in it....

[shy]

hey hk!

first of all, you're a gorgeous girl (from all your pics)! and from what i can tell, you've got true beauty as well (from inside). you most definitely possess physical beauty but what these other people don't get is that inner beauty is harder to achieve then outer beauty. a person's character and personality trait can not change overnight. in fact, many people take a lifetime to overcome their 'ugly faults'.

it's appalling what you ex's mother said to you. did you parents know about this? i think my father would have marched over to that woman's house and gave him a piece of his mind! i would to if i were your parent. NO ONE would get away talking to my kid that way! as some people have said, if it's for healthy reasons, but even then, you DO have a doctor. no one else needs to be your doctor.

speaking as a woman that's pregnant now, that's my advice - so many people have come up to me telling me what i should or shouldn't do, or that i'm eating too much or too little, or that i look like i gained too much weight too fast or that i don't look big enough, blah, blah, blah... my thoughts? hey... a pregnant woman sees her doctor, on average, about 15-18 times within her prenatal state. it's quite interesting that these people without medical backgrounds feel that they have more expertise about MY pregnancy then my doctor whom i see that often now, especialy in my 8th month. ;)

as for your ex's mother, unfortunately, there are others like her floating around. i knew a family friend (actually, two and they were both women) who tried that with me when i was in highschool (i was overweight and my boyfriend was very slender and lean). according to their philosophy, i had better lose weight so that i can 'match' his tall and slender good looks! at the time it hurt me... a lot. so i totally know how you feel. but now, at age 30, i couldn't give two hoots what people like that think. if they want to speak that way to me, then they should expect to see by backside as i walk out on them. life's too short to waste my time with people that have such small hearts.

anyway, i agree with teaz0r's attitude... always do it for yourself! that way, you are doing it for the right reasons (loving yourself) and not for others (giving into being THEIR victim).

don't stress about college and such... a lot of people put on some extra pounds during these years, especially at the beginning. it's a pretty huge change in life. even though i got trimmer mid-way and ongoing towards the end of my university years, my fittest was when i started to reach my late 20's where i went from average athletic body to really athletic body.

and now? well, i'm pregnant and happy with my big tummy. :)

all the best, girl. you rock!

[ChinaLama]

Just what is it with you and eating children?

i can eat adults, too, but they put up more of a fight.

[Emperor_Mike]

i can eat adults, too, but they put up more of a fight.

Have you tried feeding strips of chicken to chickens? Wouldn't that be weird? It's poultry cannibalism!

[kitty]

Have you tried feeding strips of chicken to chickens? Wouldn't that be weird? It's poultry cannibalism!

that's what they do at KFC... :)

[Emperor_Mike]

that's what they do at KFC... :)

OMG! I can't bring myself to eat at KFC again.

Or bring myself to start eating at KFC. Either way, I can't bring myself to any location without being horrified at poulty cannibalism.

[deez nuts]

more cushion for pushin, baby!

[kasia]

i will say this - i noticed that hk said that this makes her wary of being around asians. but the only difference i've observed between asians and whites with respect to this issue is that asians are more blunt. they'll say it to your face. and i don't think that's *necessarily* worse.

[hapakristina]

i will say this - i noticed that hk said that this makes her wary of being around asians. but the only difference i've observed between asians and whites with respect to this issue is that asians are more blunt. they'll say it to your face. and i don't think that's *necessarily* worse.

well, it's not that asians have a tendency to say anything to my face either. my ex's mother bitched to my ex, not to me. to me, she was "sweet" and "nice," all the while bitching about my flaws to everyone but me. that's the thing though. what's the point of saying it to people's face? why is MY weight anyone else's business? does it make me less of a person? does it mean i should be judged?

unless you know me, know my situation, and honestly care anything about my health and me.. i really don't understand why people feel they're justified or that it's their business to "speak their mind" to people that are overweight. i mean, "hello?! i do have a mirror and see myself every morning. thanks for the 'wake up call' but you're not telling me anything new." that's my problm though.. i want people to take the time to get to KNOW me and then make fair judgment, but sometimes people see me and start judging me because i'm overweight.. i have a huge problem with that.

i mean, my grandmother on my asian side has spoken up about my weight.. and it wasn't really that she was bringing up my WEIGHT, it was the things that she said and how she went about it. but at least with her, she has some legit concerns about my weight (like my health).. and that was the basis of her comments. i don't think that all asians feel this way, but given that i've experienced this form of judgment and i have friends who's parents and family members make such biting comments.. it does make me a bit self-conscious around asians wondering if i'm being judged as well. i hate feeling that way and i wish i could so easily NOT feel that way. :frown:

[hapakristina]

hey hk!

first of all, you're a gorgeous girl (from all your pics)! and from what i can tell, you've got true beauty as well (from inside). you most definitely possess physical beauty but what these other people don't get is that inner beauty is harder to achieve then outer beauty. a person's character and personality trait can not change overnight. in fact, many people take a lifetime to overcome their 'ugly faults'.

it's appalling what you ex's mother said to you. did you parents know about this? i think my father would have marched over to that woman's house and gave him a piece of his mind! i would to if i were your parent. NO ONE would get away talking to my kid that way! as some people have said, if it's for healthy reasons, but even then, you DO have a doctor. no one else needs to be your doctor.

speaking as a woman that's pregnant now, that's my advice - so many people have come up to me telling me what i should or shouldn't do, or that i'm eating too much or too little, or that i look like i gained too much weight too fast or that i don't look big enough, blah, blah, blah... my thoughts? hey... a pregnant woman sees her doctor, on average, about 15-18 times within her prenatal state. it's quite interesting that these people without medical backgrounds feel that they have more expertise about MY pregnancy then my doctor whom i see that often now, especialy in my 8th month. ;)

as for your ex's mother, unfortunately, there are others like her floating around. i knew a family friend (actually, two and they were both women) who tried that with me when i was in highschool (i was overweight and my boyfriend was very slender and lean). according to their philosophy, i had better lose weight so that i can 'match' his tall and slender good looks! at the time it hurt me... a lot. so i totally know how you feel. but now, at age 30, i couldn't give two hoots what people like that think. if they want to speak that way to me, then they should expect to see by backside as i walk out on them. life's too short to waste my time with people that have such small hearts.

anyway, i agree with teaz0r's attitude... always do it for yourself! that way, you are doing it for the right reasons (loving yourself) and not for others (giving into being THEIR victim).

don't stress about college and such... a lot of people put on some extra pounds during these years, especially at the beginning. it's a pretty huge change in life. even though i got trimmer mid-way and ongoing towards the end of my university years, my fittest was when i started to reach my late 20's where i went from average athletic body to really athletic body.

and now? well, i'm pregnant and happy with my big tummy. :)

all the best, girl. you rock!

thanks for your encouragement and your kind words. i love your attitude and i guess as i'm getting older and more self-assured in myself as a person.. i am starting to give less weight to what others think about me and their opinions of me and my weight. thanks again and i really appreciate what you had to say! g'luck with your pregnancy, girl! :smile:

[ism]

i <3 chub

[missmeow]

I think you're pretty. They are probably intimidated by your height.